It’s easier to paste the Facebook post I made, so. There is reference to vaguebooking. Basically, I feel like I was reborn Sunday, Nov 12 after some sort of bodily event that knocked me flat.
Ok, so vaguebooking at 4am… It’s a bit of a read, but here goes…
Last night after I ate, I started getting sharp pains right around my diaphragm and was having trouble breathing. It got to the point that I was telling The Universe that I’m not going out like that. It was bad enough that I was actually getting ready to go to the ER (if you know me, you know how bad that is). I don’t know if I shut down or blacked out, but I woke up at 330 in the dark, alone (because Thomas was at work before it got that bad) and I didn’t know if I was actually alive or not . I honestly thought I was dead. I called Thomas at 4am and begged him to tell me I was actually talking to him. He got me mostly calmed down and I kept the lights on the rest of the early morning.
I have survived
- my biological father beating my biological mother while she was pregnant with me (that’s why I’m adopted)
- being a feral farm kid and jumping on bulls and jumping out of barns
- bullying so bad that I had no outlet other than self harm
- meeting random, age inappropriate guys at shady motels
- attempted rape
- physical, emotional, and financial abuse
I was NOT going to let reheated take out food take me out.
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