I've been a lazy updater lately.
Tuesday I had my 2nd to last chemo. So close to being done! I sat in a new corner at the infusion center and found myself facing a wall of wigs. They have this program where people can donate wigs there and patients can take them for free. It's a really nice program. Anyway, I took a picture of it:
It reminded me of the scene from Eight Heads in a Duffel Bag where Joe Pesci's character is dreaming that the heads are singing Mr. Sandman. And there were 8 wigs, so it was kind of perfect. I kept randomly looking at them through my infusion and giggling to myself. I'm easily amused.
I've also figured out that eating incredibly salty food during chemo really helps. I usually get a weird chemically taste in my mouth during the infusion and the last couple of times I've eaten Chex Mix and I think the salt must overpower my taste buds so I don't register the chemical taste or something. I usually don't have a huge tolerance for salt but I find myself eating like half a bag of the stuff because I just can't get enough! It's weird.
The days following chemo I have a kind of gross, sweet taste in my mouth and it makes water and milk taste disgusting, but fizzy water seems OK. (My urine also smells like a hair permanent for about 24 hours after chemo. It's kind of unnerving.) I also have a hard time making myself eat those days, but this time, I followed the salty theory and bought things I wouldn't want to eat under normal circumstances and it ended up working really well! I bought frozen, deep fried pickles (I love them at the fair but frozen leaves something to be desired) and ranch dressing to dip them in and they were pretty much the best day-after-chemo food ever. It was ridiculous. I also got some PF Chang's skillet meals, which were incredibly salty and tasted a bit poisonous, but somehow worked with my weird mouth and appetite. I'm also trying to avoid foods I'm really fond of those days because forcing myself to eat when I don't feel great makes me develop an aversion to some of those foods. Lately, I can't bring myself to eat boxed mac and cheese (one of my all time favorite comfort foods). I also need to take a really long break from eating ramen because that was my post-chemo food of choice for a while and now the thought of it makes my stomach turn a bit.
Anxiety is building up again for my final PET scan. It'll be about 2 weeks after my last chemo. Everything so far is indicating that it will be fine but I can't help it.
I'm also getting anxious about school stuff. It's silly and I know I'll do fine but I'm getting thrown into a rotation mid-September without any training. It's Acupuncture so it's not like it'll be super intense but I want to learn and do well. I'll have to email the office folks who have been helping me out and ask if I'll need to know how to use the hospital computer system for that rotation. Luckily, I don't think it'll be an issue for my November Raptor Center rotation.
I'm also anxious about having to have the cancer talk with everyone I interact with when I'm back at school. I just want to get back to normal and get on with my life. Maybe I can wear a giant post-it note on my head that says "I did the cancer thing and won. I'm good now, thanks for your concern. Can we please just talk about something else, like dog poop?" Blerg.
Oh! I was emailed the syllabus for my online class and it shouldn't interfere with the vacation Aaron and I are planning, so yay for that! My laptop is not exactly in top condition and I don't want to buy a new one before I'm ready to, so I was afraid of how I'd keep up with coursework on the road. Luckily, while assignments and quizzes all have due dates, all of them can be completed as far in advance of the due date, so yay for that! I like the idea of completing the entire course before vacation but we'll see how well my procrastinator self can actually deal with that :P
OK, need to go look for fun outdoorsy stuff in PA. Really need to get on this vacation planning thing!
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