p1:19
Ok so lets start coz im so tired it’s inhuman and I gotta go at fucking 7am.
So class was cool, we had that science project on the axarqy cool and stuff. Nothing remarkable.
The birthday, F was there that’s the only important thing. I told Matro on our way there, and then we told everyone bout the Marco and Bruno chism (I still couldn’t believe it, and neither Matro not I wanted to do so). So shocked and stuff. I got my costume and we gm ought stuff and we went to the part. Extremely humbling moment, walking around like a fair gipsy magician.
Anyways, party was lit. I was scared I would not know how to act n shi but you ju t gotta move from time to time, eat and drink. I only took 1 cup of vodka, and it was awful. I was all the time sober and I kinda regret it but not too much. So I danced and danced and screamed and sang (my voice is cracked atm), and then I helped drunk and depressed people (drunk people depressed people, and people who were both. Mainly Ingrid and Isis. It was a mix of sad and depressing and ridiculously funny. Honorable mention on the way Ingrid called S all the time, it was between extremely cute and teenager mental drama.
Things that happened:
Idk if I was some kind of idol but I danced a few times and there was even a circle. I took some photos of myself and was taken many more, and I got some videos of me dancing. I even changed my pfp finally, it’s not a THE Photo but it’s better than the one before.
More, I always ended up dancing by myself when everybody screamed and danced q someone else just spontaneously, but yk what, I kept dancing (all my body hurts). Matro was w a friend of her, Marco literally was hooking up w Anika (I’m honestly happy I didn’t see him at the party for too long, but he did seem happy when he saw me, he was a bit drunk, but I think he doesn’t hate me. He was dressing on a black suspender shirt and just a huge ass eye-liner w a dot painted on his face. Wtf, what was he dressing up, a bitcher? Anyways), the J and Nacho (who was always close to Alba, many potential couples will have development coz of this party) was by themselves, B was doing his thing, S was with Ingrid. Everyone had someone else to stick to and I kinda felt alone, but yk what again, I still ate the dance floor. I had a lotta fun even tho I was feeling a bit alone, in fact, it has been one of the best days of my life, and this week has been awesome. Even if it’s coz I just talked a lot with B who is still my crush oficially. Look, last Friday B call till 5am, cool weekend and bother talk and run till home after spending the day w B. Two days ago, another talk w B, and now this huge ass party, it was all awesome.
B and Matro literally kissed, they were so close and so, idk, friends (it was a friends and situation kiss, both explained it in the same way to me), that they were dancing and just ate each other. Ngl I was jealous af, and it made me feel a bit more alone. I would’ve loved to be physically close to B, but I was not almost at any moment. That kiss, or kissed, mad eme so jealous not only of kissing B, but of their friendship and the fun they were having.
B literally helped 11 people who cried, I told him (we were talking rn) that he has limits n stuff. He is just so good he helps other people and puts himself away, and always manage to make everyone happy, I don’t deserve that boy. We talked for 15mins rn, but I didn’t keep going into detail because I don’t wannabe be his 12 person, and instead be like his rest or safe guy, that’s my way of helping him. S also mentioned that I was the psychologist friend and the helper when I was w Ingrid while she trowed up. B mentioned that he was the happiest when he had no phone, and he was in his autistic arc (hr like me fr on that one).
Apart from that, all teenager chism, not interesting.
Im so tired its unbelievable, I’m writing this on auto. I gotta get up in 5 hours and get 4 car and I don’t want, I would prefer to go to that math class with B at 10am. I still feel ugly, but the costume and eye-liner helped quite a lot. I was gonna stretch (my twin muscles got up today mid party) but I literally can’t move. I wanna sleep, but I wanna talk to B but he didn’t seem like it tho he dropped a “when shall talk then” at the beginning at the convo.
Also wanna look more fit and overall better coz B is fine af.
In general, very cool day, with all usual problems and some more, but with some great stuff happening.
My humbling moments list went from 30 to 47 today.
I don’t wanna forget this day ever.
p1:47
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