Sheesh! Getting a day in with zero social media or porn was waaaay more difficult than i imagined. I wonder how tf was i easily coasting along till 2015, brain-dopamine connect working fulltime today to make me do stupid stuff but all i did when the urge became too much was opening prosebox and just see the latest update (2-3 times in total today). Some posts were downright depressing but hey, this IS the place to vent and release so go ahead!
Regarding the day, so even though it was raining heavy and me being the bum finding a small excuse to miss stuff (even those which i know would be beneficial for me) i got the gym done in the morning (decent workout but need to find better triceps exercise). Then came home to see that the link for the online lec was already there in the mail! Rushed and opened it only to find out majority of students were missing :/ Was hoping to do my wordlist in the morning itself but had to complete report and after that work kept on piling (finally got the list done an hour ago). I was hoping spotify would help me reduce the boredom but even music can do so much (especially during the time when i was eating, had made a habit to watch yt along with it). During the break made a dash to the store to get a few sweatshirts for the winter (i kid you not, i only recently found about them and i am a grown ass adult! Really fell in love with the fitting and overall look). I have recently started to buy solid colour/minimal print tees, felt really out place when i saw my old wardrobe. I am digging my new moustache look but mom just hates it! Atleast dad is indifferent to it so no double pressure to trim it off.
Mundane stuff really but it is the dopamine crash that is making it seems to be depressing to me in my mind, better to get off it here instead of struggling with it when doing my masters. Sometimes the blank is boring and feels like the end of the world, sometimes it is the thing you desire the most. The state of nothingness, no emotion, no feeling , not a single digressing thought to move you away and make you get lost in your thoughts, it is just you,,,,
Arrivederci friend, travelling tomorrow so meet you day after tomorrow. Take care! (ik boring and aimless stuff today. Writing to you today was the only thing i was excited about from the beginning of the day and when i finally get the chance, BOOM absolute bs! funny,no 😂?)
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