Don’t you ever think about the ripple effects that change our lives forever? In 2001 my parents got great jobs in the U.S. and we were all set to relocate from Perth. Everything was packed, sold, and my family and I were going to embrace our new lives. Then 9/11 happened. Due to the security threats, all visas that were issues, were canceled. Thus making us to relocate to Sydney instead. And what followed was unhappiness, death, and misery.
My dad hated his job because he wasn’t challenged and he was underappreciated. My mom was abused by her in-laws, and in five short years, my dad’s mental health got so bad that he decided to drive his car into the ocean, and abandon my mom and I. I love and appreciate my life, but I can’t help but imagine about that life I could have had. Growing up in America, close to family. No childhood trauma. Not being abandoned. Not being molested right after. Having every opportunity in life.
Not feeling like a failure, an outcast, the black sheep. My family is extraordinary. They are all the best in their fields and they have brilliant minds. I am the only mediocre, ordinary one. I can’t even do well on the stupid LSAT. Many people go through hardships and yet persevere into remarkable individuals that achieve the life they want. I, on the other hand, am a disappointment to my family and myself. I’d never say this out loud, but sometimes I just want to end it. Because my biggest fears might come true. Because I might save my family a lot of heartache before they realize that I’m a failure.
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