It kinda hurt but it's my fault too in How Life's Going

I had a crush on this one boy. We’ve known each other for almost 7 months. I’m a Muslim, he’s a Christian. I’m a borderline suicidal person, he’s cracked. We both live in different countries. At first, we weren’t that close but I felt attracted to him. I don’t know what to call that feeling. I hung out with him a lot. I mean I just follow him around and he’d let me watch him doing his work since he knows I’m not one that speaks a lot. After a few months of being friends, I had to leave his life for a bit. So I did, I went for 4/5 months. I couldn’t contact him during those months since he doesn’t have social media. A week after I came back, I found out from my friend’s discord group that he finally made a discord account. I immediately send him a friend request and texted him. We started talking again. Later that night, I was ranting to him about a book that I was reading. He kept on laughing at me and said that I could just call him and rant all about it instead of texting him. I had to remind him that I don’t speak that much and it’ll probably be too silent. The next day, I asked him if he wants to watch a movie with me. He said sure and we started watching movies together every single day. After 2 weeks of getting closer, I confessed to him my feelings and I was expecting a rejection. He actually liked me back and I was in shock. And now we’ve lasted for almost 3 weeks. I haven’t talked to him about our religious issues. I was waiting for the right time to come. Earlier today, we watched ‘Corpse Bride’. He kept on saying that he’d never get married. He’s not ready yet and he will never be ready for it. I just laughed it off since I didn’t want to say anything about that. I can’t say anything about that since I haven’t brought up our religious issues. It still hurt me that he doesn’t want to get married in the future. Not that I’m saying he’ll be with me for sure in the future. But if that’s the case and he still doesn’t want to get married after we discuss our religious issues, then I suppose I know when’s the time to leave. I just don’t know how to bring up the topic. He always tells me that it’s okay to speak up my mind around him. But that couldn’t stop me from worrying. What do I do? Do I just wait and be patient ‘till the right time comes? I should take things slow. It’ll come off naturally. Let’s hope it’ll all go smoothly. The major part of life is going well, the minor parts are very bumpy and disturbing. Oh, how do I silence the voices in my head?.