him in For You by Tv Girl

I honestly have never felt the way i feel for him on anyone else, ever. when i met him, it felt like a part of me was only present when he was around, if that makes sense. like it only existed when i was with him. and at first i saw him as a friend,but i just kinda fell for him. he stated noticing me, and it suddenly got hard to be parted from him. like that little piece of me that didn’t exist when he was gone turned into a vaccum that just pulled me in and got me stuck. It felt like constantly a rubber band was being pulled in my gut when i missed him, and i just don’t know why. he is one of the literal worst people i’ve ever met, yet it causes me physical pain to say goodbye to him when i see him. and when i found out that he was just going to use me the moment he could because he liked me but not enough to leave his girlfriend, nothing changed. in fact, i felt kinda more pulled toward him because it didn’t register that he might just be using me, but all i could think was “hesaidhelikedmehesaidhelikedmehesaidhelikedme” i am so lost and stuck, and recently i have had no one and nothing to vent to, so i thought this would help. whats wrong with me?