3/17/14 Friendship Sucks!!! in MY JOURNAL

I am 48 years old. So why is it that when there's the prospect of a new friendship, I get really ecstatic, then, when it falls apart like it usually does, my heart is broken into a million pieces just like when I was a kid?
I always start out new friendships being so happy to have found a friend, and yet, deep inside I am already wondering how and when it will end. It is usually because that person begins to NOT meet my expectations in a friend. She begins to show she doesn't care, and eventually it just dies. At first I am deeply mourning the loss, until I get to the point where I want to kick myself for falling into the shit again. FUCK YOU for telling me that you felt I was your best friend, but as soon as some other things and people came along, you forgot me. Because of people like you, I will never truly trust in a friendship....EVER.