15DECEMBER2019 in Sergeant's Log

This weekend:

(1) Got sick this weekend. My body hurts and I out-of-it cognitively.. I am such a pussy when I get sick.
(2) Had a company Christmas party on Friday evening at a fancy Chinese Restaurant.. its legit! I sat down next to the owner of the company, who is now semi retired. He is a Vietnam Veteran and had a good talk about the military. Over the course of the party I got fairly intoxicated, so inherently the next day I questioned if I was being too much, but I do not recall overstepping. It was a good time. I did start flirting with one of the waitresses and had a little chat with her as I was leaving. She gave me the “green-light” to ask for her number, but for whatever reason, I decided not to. I think it is because I know deep down that I do not have the real mental capacity to hold up a relationship with someone currently and she seemed very sweet, so why get her involved? I DO NOT KNOW.
(3) After the party I went to go see a woman I do not really care for. She is a good person and attractive, but I am just not into it. She is aware of my feelings, and says that isn’t looking for anything serious either. We slept together that night. Every time we have sex, the next day I find myself trying to promise myself that I won’t see her again. I suppose it is because once I am sober, spending any amount of time with her just isn’t desirable and just a waste of my time… but when I am drunk she is convenient. She says the same about me. Such a weird situation.
(4) Spent most of yesterday sleeping.. or at least I tried to. I was trying to escape my miserable existence. My hips were hurting pretty good from my body being inflamed or whatever… I am no doctor, but I have noticed that anytime I get sick the parts of my body that have been the most abused from my life hurts. It was my back today. Water and ibuprofen was my breakfast. Took a hot shower and stretched for 20 minutes. My back feels much better now.
(5) UberEats is the devil, but Shrimp fried rice is amazing. It was today’s lunch.
(6) My dreams have been very odd recently. Last night I had a dream in Chinese. I do not know mandarin or anything. First time I recall a dream like this happening.
(7) I live in a house with a woman, she is a long time friend. We both have dogs and the living situation is really nice. My observation of her this weekend: She just got back with someone she was seeing for about 6 months that ended last year. I really like the guy. She is madly in love with him; however, I do not think that they are not going to last. Almost every time they see each other they just sit there with the TV on while looking at their phone saying almost nothing. They also drink a lot… since they got back together it is at least 4 times a week… It is as if they need to drink in order to feel comfortable with one another. At the least it seems really boring. This is the pattern that separated them in the first place. I hope they recognize this and flip it around.
(8) I believe my dog recognized that wasn’t feeling well this weekend. She laid next to me and didn’t make much of a fuss to get me to play. She is a Dalmatian so usually she is a nutball. Clara Barton is her name.
(9) I watched a video recorded podcast today which was hilarious. It is called “King and the Sting”. Love those guys.
(10) I need to start going back to the gym this week. It has been over two months since I have been.

Last updated December 16, 2019