Up down, up down, up down, as if I’m being shaken in a protein shaker. As I stated to a friend earlier, I cant help but, KNOW, theres a black cloud hovering over head. This thought goes against my, be optimistic out look I’m trying these days, although these stream of events has me in a whirl wind.
Work has been alright honestly, billing is still way below what I’d like my weekly average to be. It is a small stumble in the right direction, after all he did program my name into the work app, “officially”. Instead of it being which ever lead tech had it 400 years ago. I do not have a regular spray tech yet, which makes it hard to get into a groove, and pattern of doing things. Again, small steps.
Friday night I did my usual MaryJane pick up. Angelica and I hung out for a bit, talked, hit the subject of Tori, for once talking about it made me feel better, we smoked, and I drank. Ha. An hour, or two after leaving, as I was heading to meet Marcus at the bar, Tori starts texting me asking me to be friends. I explained why for many reasons it wasn’t a good idea, I can’t watch her be with someone else, or not talk to her daily, touch and love on her when I am arouns her. We havent been “just friends” since we were in our late teens. Even then, we both established we had a thing for each other. Figures shes at Angelicas house, women.....
Of course I end up there, even after pleading with her to leave me alone for the night because I was drunk. It was alright…ish for the most part, we talked…in short she wants to be friends and…”see what happens, and where it goes”. May be my lack of faith in relationships in this day and age, but I feel like its a, Im going to keep you hanging on while I do what ever I want. I don’t truly see it in Tori’s character to do something of such, but hurt people can do some awful things.
We have talked a little since. Really not much at all, remaining calm, as if my insides arnt shaking because of it, nearly impossible. Take ir for what it is, let her lead, type of mentality. Honestly, theres to much on my plate to really focus to much energy on worrying about a call or text.
Speaking of over flowing plates, amonst trying to maintain sanity over this woman, the last few days have mentality been better then the last few months. Then, and only at the precise moment I feel the slightest bit of peace, KABOOM, little dick and balls come down to rain all over my sunshiny day.
As Im walking out of the gym this morning, per usual, the gang of cops are gathered outside the bagel shop. Whether the actually go there for bagels and coffee, Im not sure, but it’s their spot. I pack all my things in my car, sit and search for some local diner to eat at as I smoke my after gym cigarette, as I do every damn morning. Finally decided Ill just make food instead of buying, chill and study. Cool, boom, plan done, as I pull out, one of the cops follows me. For once I wasn’t worried, I just sorted everything out mid October ect, as I pull into a gas station, he flips his lights on. Confused, I couldn’t have done anything wrong, the gas station is right next to the gym. Come to find out my license is suspended, took me 4 hours, though I did find out its over an insurance card, a damn insurance card…no one asked to see a damn insurance card when I just reinstated everything, the officer never said anything. So, I am slightly confused on how theh can just suspend something, for not recieving a document they never asked to see, or send a notice, “hey, if you dont show us this document, we’re goinf to revoke your means of transportation, without forewarning”
I feel like anything government run, is out to rape you of freedom, and money any chance they get, just simply because they can. Once in the system, always in the system.
As much as I would like to continue into my family issues draining me, I have to tend to the women of my family. My mother is on a binder and scaring the life out of everyone.
Loading comments...