No gain, no pain in rants
- March 13, 2014, 10:03 a.m.
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- Public
Someone on facebook posted a link to things only your best friend would know about you. In reading it, I realized, according to the designer of that list, I have no best friends... there is NO one who knows that information about me. (http://www.buzzfeed.com/regajha/things-only-your-best-friends-know-about-you?bffb)
I realized I haven't had love in my life for over a decade. Although I have friends, none are THAT close.
So I started to think about love:
2000 - my father and my last dog both died
2001 - got back in touch with an ex-boyfriend, and the woman who'd been like a daughter to me... Then a month later, had a bad break-up with the then current boyfriend. A month after that met a male student who became like a son to me (I guess more I became like a mother to him). (Oh, and 9-11) I met a man in a club - had a wonderful evening of deep emotional talking, we dated one time after that... then he dumped me. I stopped going to that club.
By 2003, I lost touch with both the woman/daughter and student/son. And another pet died.
I met my movie buddy around that time or the next year... and although we're friends and get together a few times a month, there are limits to our closeness. Man/woman friendship is tricky.
So, no love... no gain...no pain (of loss).
Deleted user ⋅ March 13, 2014
I have no best friends either - I guess hubby may know all that about me - but doubt it!
Deleted user ⋅ March 13, 2014
My so called best friend of 43 years up and decided to play smart ass and we haven't spoken since last June. And lately I've really been missing my dog from 22 years ago. And Shelby was my best friend for sure. But then, I always heard a dog was man's best friend. ; )
ThoughtsAfter ⋅ March 13, 2014
It is complex isn't it? I profess not to understand most of my friends who have significant others in their 70s. I do have a best friend but I am not her best friend, I am her second best friend...talk about complexities. I am a friend oriented person and always have friends but I ask a lot less than most people do, I think, from my friends. My best friend and I have had misunderstandings and falling outs but always move forward to heal the rift. We value each other's support more than being right I suppose. I noted in the nursing home where my father lived for four years, the higher functioning residents had sometime lived for years in the same cities...but apparently had never had enough conversation with each other to have found that out. (I taught a poetry workshop there and had some time with the residents.) What I am trying to explore is that lots of people have fewer friends as they age and perhaps it is more normal than we realize.
Darcy0207 from OD ThoughtsAfter ⋅ March 14, 2014
I recently (three years ago) got back in touch with my best friend from childhood. I've seen her fewer than 10 times since then. I am single and retired; she's still working, has grown "children", her mother just died towards the end of last year, and her father is still alive... oh, and her husband is sick. I want so MUCH more from her than she's able to give. We enjoy each others' company when we DO get together, but two times a year??? I think that's probably why fewer people have friends as they age - life is so much more complicated.
ladylovestheocean ⋅ March 15, 2014
just stopping by. take care. Sheri
ermentrude ⋅ March 15, 2014
Ha! I don't think I'd want someone to know when I was doing a poo or even half of that other stuff! Good friends don't need to know everything about you.
Deleted user ⋅ March 17, 2014
for me life kinda sucks with being in love. i don't wish you pain, but i sure do wish you lots of love.