Work or Fun? in My life

I’m failing at life right now and it sucks.It’s like I want to d better but my mind doesn’t.I can’t say I’ve done my best,but I wish I could.I need motivation.I wish someone could do my homework for me.I am stressed,and when I get stressed my body shuts down and all I want to do is submerge my stress and just ignore it,but that’s not helping me.I should probabaly start taking my pills instead of emptying them out.They help me focus but I hate the way that they make me feel.They make me shut everything out and all I want to do is write or do homework.That isn’t the kind of life I want to live.On my pills I can’t have fun but off of my pills I have too much fun.I don;t know what to do.