Two Different Mes in What's Happening

I don’t think coming back to my house for the weekend is going to work for me long term.

It’s not entirely a logistics issue. I don’t mind the drive or anything like that. It just seems pointless. My roommates do it every weekend, but they have families waiting for them at home. I know many people who make the drive every single day.

These people still have a reason to keep their houses. For me, my house has become redundant and in some ways even a burden.

Probably the most interesting thing I’ve noticed is that I seem to default back to some of my old habits when I get home. I’m like two different people depending where I am at the time. I like the newer version of me better.

There is no immediate rush for me to get rid of my house. It is paid off so it isn’t costing me too much to keep. Once I get situated at my new job and get as financially stable as I was before I was laid off in August, I will have some big decisions to make. I’m curious what my life will be like 6 months from now.

For many years I’ve been waiting for that moment in life when I can just put things on autopilot and coast for a little bit. I thought I was going to get that with my last job, but it was short lived. I feel like I’ve never been able to commit to any long-term plans because I never know where the future me is going to be.

It makes me cringe sometimes when I hear baby boomers say things like: “I’ve worked at this place for 40 years and the only thanks I get is this $100 gift card.” I can’t even fathom the stress-free life of working at the same place for 40 years. That type of thing doesn’t even exists anymore; coasting for 40 straight years at the same place and making top dollar. Some of these people are in their mid-sixties and won’t retire because their job is so easy and they think that their job owes them something more.

I probably sound a little bitter, but I’m actually not. The things I’ve learned from bouncing around and working all throughout the United States are invaluable. They are the best memories I have. The experience I have at the age of 34 has put me light years ahead of almost anyone who works in the same field as me.

The actual thought of working at the same place for 40 years is depressing to me. I think I’m just looking for a little slice of that pie while I’m in my 30’s so I can enjoy life a little bit and work on myself.