Saving Her in The Write Year #write365

The time came where I had to sit down, sit still, and reintroduce myself to the child locked far away inside.

Here I found a scared little girl - around age 9 or so - sitting on the wall in a damp alley, darkness narrowly evading her by the orange light mounted above. She had her head to her knees, shivering from the cold whipping against her skin.

The sight of what I had done robbed me of my breath momentarily. How could I have locked away this precious soul? Although unintentional, it was still cruel to snuff the light of this child - her hopes, her dreams - to conform to the desire of what others wanted her to be.

I reached out my hand to my child within, but as she looked up at me, she shook her head NO, and retreated back into the safety of her own arms. She didn’t trust me, and I couldn’t really blame her.

After all, I put her here…how was she supposed to trust me to rescue her?

I was hurt. I sat in silence and prayed:

*Lord, I don’t know how to make this right. I allowed this monstrosity to happen - the suppression of my desires to please others, the dimming of my light so that others wouldn’t be blinded. I thought this would give me what I wanted, but I now see that it hasn’t. This way of thinking will never fulfill me.

I’m so sorry, little one. No matter the excuses of why I kept you in this terrible hell, I want to make amends and bring you back into the light where you belong. I will do anything to save you…please.*

Not knowing that my thoughts were being projected out loud, the little girl raised her head slightly.

“Will you really do anything?”

“YES!” I exclaimed in surprise and excitement. This startled her, and I immediately fell into a whisper.

“Yes, I will do anything…name it.”