ASMR and OCD in Depression

Most people associate ASMR videos as relaxing and satisfying. As someone who is diagnosed OCD, I disagree with this. My OCD has always been a struggle for me. With all the counting and little rituals, it has been quite the experience. I do admit there are some ASMR videos I do find satisfying, but for the most part, I do not find them a good experience at all. A good example of this is a video I watched showing someone cutting pieces of chalk and squishing a honeycomb. These triggered me very badly. I kept thinking in my mind about the feeling of chalk and the sound and the textures it has. I have always hated the way it felt and sounded. The honey one I think was the most triggering for me. I hate sticky things and continually wash my hands after touching such items. I hate the taste of plain honey also. I kept thinking of that and it really put me on edge. I begin to hope that people will start to understand that even though these videos are supposed to satisfy, they aren’t too many at all. Some people are very triggered by this. It is hard for other people who don’t suffer from these conditions to understand. I am using this as an example to be mindful to others. It may seem odd that we may arrange or do things until we like it, but it is a part of who we are and it helps us deal with our struggles. Thank you if you read it all. I appreciate it. Feel free to share or add things to it.