Unworthy of love in Shattered Heart

I learned a few thing today.
1. Everything is my fault!
2. I am no longer needed/wanted!
3. I’m not enough!!
4. The only way to prove you love someone is sex!😢

And that makes me feel that I’m no better than a whore. To be told all the time, “you don’t love me because you never want to do anything with me”
Everything I say gets twisted around to make me look like I’m the the bad guy!!
Yet, I’m not the one having an affair. He is.
Oh and that’s my fault too!
It doesn’t matter that I do everything for him. I always have dinner ready when he gets home, I help with his morning routine, he has clean clothes, I do everything , I put everything right in front of him even when hes 2 steps away and he can just get it for himself. I guess it’s not enough.
I feel like all I am to him is a maid, slave, whore! I have s lot more to say, but I just can’t put it into words!
I will never even consider suicide, but some days I wish that I would go to sleep and never wake up. Ever since that bitch came in the picture, I feel like my heart and soul have been destroyed!
The worst thing is that I dont make enough money to survive on my own and he knows it!! 😭☹