NTS in Dear So & So

As of late, I don’t know what’s wrong with you. A lot of what used to hold importance is slowly falling into a seemingly bottomless pit of nothingness. You used to smile so much that if one wasn’t on your face, one would immediately question the state of your well being. You’ve slipped into a place of not caring. Only the very few important people, places and things in your life get your attention and are capable of holding it. What happened to believing in the good of all people? Or…finding the rainbow at the end of the storm? It’s almost as if someone obliterated all of your positivity, the rose colored shades and left the shell of what was and what will be as they filled the emptiness with what’s real and negativity. Where did all of the fight for what was right and what you deserve go? Who caused that once roaring fire to turn into smoldering embers? Why don’t you believe in YOU? Where did You go?

Is it possible to lose one’s self without trauma causing one’s self to wither and hide?

When trauma once took you away from me for years on end…I understood. When you couldn’t bare to look in the mirror because trauma told you that no one cared…I understood. This space that you’re in…I don’t understand.. You’ve been blessed beyond your greatest dreams yet you can’t find it in you to smile from deep within. Who.Are.YOU? Where have YOU gone? Just know as I write this tears fall down my cheeks for you. When you’re ready to come back, once you’ve found yourself again… I’ll be waiting, with open arms..to embrace us…

#NoteToSelf