Put Your Peach on my Mango. in Your Face

  • Jan. 19, 2018, 4:54 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

My work day yesterday was okay. I got my walk in the afternoon. The weather was perfect and I had my headphones in. Most of the walk back was just David Bowie’s Queen Bitch on repeat because, let’s face it, it’s a fucking great song.

M picked me up after work and we went to Applebees. We had a great waitress. I ate a ton of riblets and french fries. We were there far longer than I wanted, but that’s a given. I like to eat and run, M likes to luxuriate over a meal. We got home and walked Ernest, who was thrilled to see me, after being left behind when we went to Sam’s Club in the AM, and then was left behind again when M left to pick me up. It’s a long day for a small dog. I went to bed shortly after we got home, so I could read and snuggle with Ernie. That was all good and well, until I woke up at 1am to the sound of him pissing on the carpet next to my bed. Couldn’t piss on the pee pad, or even just right on the plastic flooring. I have no idea even how to clean piss out of carpet. Thankfully, we are not like you fancy people with wall to wall carpeting, and the carpet I’m talking about is a large offcut of carpet that I hoarded from Tracy’s new office, so I have the benefit of lifting it up and getting underneath it to sop up the excess pee. So, I blotted off what I could, ran water through it, catching it at the bottom with more paper towel, then heavily spritzed it with that anti-pee spray, and left yet more paper towel underneath to catch what it could. We don’t have any carpet cleaner. Any suggestions on what else I could do? I’m tempted to just cut that part of the carpet away and toss it. I love carpet, but I’m just way to skeeved about things being spilled on it or animals peeing on it. I really don’t think I could ever have carpet in my own home.

That was a lot of pee talk.

It’s Friday, and I am relieved. This week felt long, and yet I am slightly surprised that Friday has arrived.

I am eagerly collecting my 1099s and my W-2 and preparing to lodge my tax return. Because I had so many medical expenses this year, I should be able to claim a bunch of them that are over the threshold, so my fears of ending up with a tax bill are abating. The medical bills I have would easily destroy any tax bill. I just don’t know what to expect, to be honest, but I want to know sooner rather than later because I am an impatient little sod.

Must remove half drunk water bottles from the car today. It’s supposed to get cold, and I noticed yesterday that the bottle in the boot of the car was frozen. I don’t need a thin, plastic water bottle cracking and water spilling everywhere, and I feel like that’s something that is in my near future.

Back on my diet today. I binged yesterday morning on snacks and junk. Naughty. This morning I had my shake, and I have the option of another shake for lunch or some low cal green beans (obsessssssssed), tuna, soup, mandarins and of course, all the teaaaaaaa. I like weird combinations of food, and so tuna and canned green beans (splashed with Tabasco) is actually a great lunch, in my opinion. M will prepare a balanced meal for dinner, so that’s fine.

Firebabe January 19, 2018

As soon as we got dogs, I bought a Spot Bot. It's a lovely little machine that cleans all the nasty pee/poop accidents right out of your carpet / area rug without you having to spray stuff, and mop stuff up with towels. Hands down one of the best things I've ever invested in.

I eat tuna and green beans all the time!

AlexYourAlterEgo Firebabe ⋅ January 19, 2018

Oh that sounds like a nice machine to have! We have a good carpet cleaner thingy at the mansion, but I just don't feel like it's worth the effort to lug it home and get it happening on what is essentially a piece of carpet that belongs in the trash.

I am happy to know I'm not the only tuna and beans weirdo!

Pies on a Carousel January 19, 2018

That was the one benefit of living in a cold place. I could always use my car as a refrigerator for my drinks.

AlexYourAlterEgo Pies on a Carousel ⋅ January 19, 2018

Yes. When we're on a lengthy grocery trip over several stores, M is pleased to have a cold trunk to store cheese in.

Stephably AlexYourAlterEgo ⋅ January 20, 2018

Same. But we only get 3ish months of that option lol. We TRY to remember the insulated bags when we do our shopping lol.

Deleted user January 19, 2018

I detest carpet in a house, tho' it is warmer in winter & because its an old house, it even has carpet in the kitchen..when my dog was going through toilet training, omg, it was awful! She's a german shepherd cross so huge pee's just everywhere, she's still a puppy, 9 months but am so glad she's now doing her business outside. I found Lavender concentrate, I dilute a capful with water in a spray bottle & it just seemed to get rid of the smell. I still use it on occasion. It is fairly expensive like 6 or 7 for a 100ml bottle but being that you're in the US, it'd prob be cheaper, if they have it. It lasts a long time tho'.
There's also a pet carpet spray sanitiser & deodoriser. It foams then dissipates away. Brand is no vac. Its an aussie brand so whether or not you could find something similar over there. I generally use a whole one for my house cause I have 3 dogs inside a lot of the time but you'd only need just one spray so it'd last you a long time.
Bi-carb soda works too.

Deleted user January 19, 2018

I didn't get any pics of riblets. My heart is broken.

AlexYourAlterEgo Deleted user ⋅ January 19, 2018

My phone was pretty low and kept restarting. I guess that was what made me forget! I sorry. They were not photogenic, so you didn't miss a lot. I wish I had more right now.

Deleted user AlexYourAlterEgo ⋅ January 19, 2018

Remember that picture of a ditch I sent you earlier today? IF THAT HAPPENS AGAIN - YOU KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN.

AlexYourAlterEgo Deleted user ⋅ January 19, 2018


Deleted user AlexYourAlterEgo ⋅ January 20, 2018

Glad we understand each other.

sourapple January 20, 2018

I'm so jealous! I wish my 1099 and W-2 would show up already. It was my first year paying quarterly estimated tax payments and I'm so terrified that I did it wrong. I just want to get it all over with so I don't have to think about it anymore.

Stephably January 20, 2018

Were thinking of going no carpet ourselves. We just have to remeasure everything and figure out how much it will cost us. But how big is the piece of carpet?

AlexYourAlterEgo Stephably ⋅ January 20, 2018

Oh, 4 feet...not square. Lol. It's a round piece that was cut out for the kiva fireplace. So about that big. I know I'll just toss it once it gets too frayed and gross, but I'd prefer to get it through the winter, because it does make a difference to have it next to the bed, and the piece in the living room under our feet, too.

Stephably AlexYourAlterEgo ⋅ January 20, 2018

I was just going to say if it is small enough to put in your shower and run water through it with some vinegar that would not only get rid of the stain but sometimes that urine smell can linger. But I think if you blotted it well it should be fine. A little baking soda sprinkled on the area and let to absorb the rest then vacuumed up would be sufficient.

Deleted user January 20, 2018

Never actually used one myself, but a Shamwow may be what you need
The webpage shows wine spilt on carpet, labeled "Carpet Stains", but we all really know they meant dog piss

You must be logged in to comment. Please sign in or join Prosebox to leave a comment.