The Click in QUOTIDIEN

I thought I'd shared this here, but a quick check says otherwise. Anyhow.....

The Click is sort of like my super power. I don't control it. In fact, The Click usually comes when things in my life are most out of control - or when I feel like I have no control.

The first time it happened was after a long series of abuses at my step-father's hand. I was 15 when he backhanded me, breaking my nose and splattering blood on the backsplash behind the stove.

CLICK!! Within weeks and without my mothers knowledge, I managed to work a custody change and found safety at my father's home an entire country away. Now there's an entry in the making! It wound up being a fryer to the grill kind of situation...but a change nonetheless.

When my oldest son was almost 2, he suffered 2nd and 3rd degree burns in an accident at the sitter's home. I was being bullied by social services. At that time, I also suffered a huge bronchial/asthma attack. CLICK!!

While my son recovered from burns, I learned to drive, I quit smoking cold turkey, I lost 15 lbs. I took control of the things only I could control. I was so good at it, that after 5 months, I realized I was dealing with anorexia. Then one day, I saw myself as someone else might see me, in a store mirror. A slight adjustment, and my eating/exercise routine were changed.

When my daughter was 3, I weighed in at a whopping 261 lbs. Once again, things in life were out of control. Finances were difficult. I hated our new home though I'd picked it. And someone dared me to try Atkins. CLICK! I told myself that I could do anything at 100% for two weeks.

I lost 125 lbs in 10 months that year, and kept the majority of it off until a few years ago.

And now, here I am, back in control. Finances, house on the market, no shows, some work issues, definitely the addiction thing, and dammit, all of 2013!

Then on December 31st the pain in my hands, the increase in painful migraines, and recent research that offered potential relief from what physically ailed me, and it happened? CLICK!

When I'm working with my CLICK in place, nothing is difficult.

If the goal is weight loss, the cravings are negligible. I quit smoking and never looked back. I landscaped in the hottest part of the year when peace became a physical need. I quit taking shit and stood up for myself.

So, there you have it. The Story of Click.