Even when I thought I found closure, something still feels missing. There’s still so many questions left unanswered, and so many things I wish I would have done. I wonder if what you did was on purpose, or if you really were not aware of our situation. I still wonder if I had upset you, or done something to have caused you to turn into the satan you are today. I had thought that I had done something or said something wrong. I kept thinking that I was the source of the problem. But I spoke to so many people. They all said the same thing. That is why I did what I did. I had to in order to save myself. To save myself from the pain that could’ve killed me if I had held on any longer. I had to free myself from you before you would take me down with you.
But its been 3 months already. and you’re still on my mind. I wonder how things would be different today if I had done things differently. I wonder how things would be different today if you had done things differently. I wonder where we would be today. But I ask myself the most important question: would I have been better off not sharing that part of my life with you? I had showed you my bright, confident self, only for you to tear it down little by little. You turned me back to my old, timid, self, full of uncertainty and self-doubt.
But its been 3 months. I will never be able to go back to being my old self. I have become stronger than what I used to be. I am bigger than this. I am confident. I can do anything I put my mind to, which includes forgetting you.
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