Destroyed in The Thoughts in my Head

I don’t know how to describe this feeling of being destroyed anymore.
It’s hard to imagine this is how it would end

Lets start at the beginning.
I was young, naive, ready for love.
You were looking for an ego boost.
I fell harder than I’ve ever fell,
You said all the right things…How could I not love
I loved hard, with every fiber I had.

Every hidden secret, every hidden part of me was given to you
I saw you, tomorrow, the next day, next month, next year…the forever.
It was wonderful....

And then it wasn’t.
You stopped wanting me
You stopped defending me
You stopped looking at me
You stopped holding my hand
You stopped.....

But then you were here again…
tears…
Once more you became forever…
tears…
Fights began
tears…
The jokes and laughs stopped
tears…
The happiness faded

You picked her
You choose her
You loved her
You wanted her

I still picked you
I still choose you
I still loved you
I still wanted you

Destroyed
You moved on
I lost everyone
You were happy
I was miserable
You smiled
I forgot how to smile
You slept great
I couldn’t sleep through the tears

I drank too much
Bottles, bottles, bottles,
Shots, shots, shots

Who knew pain like this existed
Who knew one could cry this much

I used to think I was strong.
Then I met you
You put me on top of the world
The problem with that though,
You are the one who threw me on the ground

Two years have passed since I met you
Never felt love like that
The downside..? I never felt hurt like that

— Southern Belle

Last updated January 11, 2019