I’ve been feeling guilty lately about not spending enough time with Freddie :(
Between working 5 days a week from 7am-4pm, having appointments after work, and just being tired when I get home, I don’t feel like I’m giving him everything he needs. I know he needs more of me. When he’s feeling lonely or like I’m not giving him enough attention, he climbs onto my lap, and either stares at me and hugs me, or attacks me. I’ve noticed he bites when I’m not giving him enough attention and he’s tired. It’s his way of saying “hey mom! pay attention to me!” so I need to nip this in the bud pronto.
There’s not much I can do about work and NYC traffic coming home. I also need to do physical therapy right now and get my legs back on track. Hopefully soon I won’t have to go twice a week. That’s been the biggest change the last couple of weeks…I’ve been gone longer periods of time than normal and he’s noticed. Monday when I picked Freddie up from my sitter, he was bawling. I guess they play cars in the hallway sometimes, to get a change of scenery. Well, my big boy likes to climb the stairs and decided he was going to go home (babysitter is on the first floor, we’re on the third floor). He climbed like a flight and a half when my sitter realized he was going all the way up, so she had to pick him up and bring him back down. Then he had a meltdown, as toddlers do. I felt terrible. He only wanted to go home! He always cries when I drop him off too :(
I know many working mamas are feeling this too. I’m trying to create a good balance, but it’s hard sometimes. I want to give him all he needs and have my attention focused on him at home. I know I need to get off my phone some more…need to stop scrolling through FB when I’m tired and get on the floor and play instead. He’s still not at that age where he really plays with anyone yet, so playtime is kinda short lived. But I do need to make more of an effort.
sigh alright, time to get back to work. gotta teach these 2nd graders about ternary form! later.
~mana~
Loading comments...