February 15, 2016. Plans in February 2016

Jake just sent me information about his dad, my ex-husband. Apparently he is now not doing well. He has no appetite and won’t eat so he is going to be fed with a tube. Jake said he told Nick, Jake’s brother, that he wanted to die.

Jake and I have already discussed that dying in hospital is NOT what I want. Like Fred did, I want to die at home. I really must get this written out for Jake because I would imagine that this will be something Nick will not support unless there is paperwork. Nick does know I want to be cremated and, I imagine he will have no problem with this.

I really don’t want to travel to MS for my ex-husband’s funeral when he dies. This is, I admit, selfishness on my part. Travelling for me involves a lot that most people don’t think about. What and when I eat has to be considered as well as always knowing where the nearest bathroom is. But, I was married to him nineteen years and there were were some good times even though he was an abusive alcoholic. If this is something Jake would prefer I do, I will do it. If my wonderful mother-in-law was still alive, I wouldn’t hesitate for a moment. I loved her and she loved me. Several of his large family have died during the years we have been divorced and this would make it easier for me to be there.

I hope he rallies and lives many years more. {He is two years older than I am.} I hope these plans are not immediately necessary…

Last updated February 15, 2016