I’ve said before that Liz tends to be the disciplinarian in our relationship. I can be too when necessary, but I often default to Liz because she’s better at it. For this reason, I wasn’t too shocked when I came home from work last week and heard her speaking sternly and sounds of spanking coming from the spare bedroom.
I poked my head in and she said she would fill me in later, so I left them to do their thing. I busied myself with other stuff, and couldn’t quite hear what she was saying, but I could tell from her tone of voice that she was genuinely angry and this wasn’t just a playful punishment.
Nearly a half hour later it was still going on, and I was pondering entering one more time just to see what was up. As I started walking toward the bedroom, Liz came walking out. She turned back into the room and said to our wife, “And we’re going back to this being your bedroom until I decide otherwise.” That sounded serious, if part of her punishment was that she would no longer be sleeping with us. I totally support Liz’s punishment decisions though, whatever they are.
I greeted her with a kiss, and she seemed still upset. After giving such a serious punishment, I figured it would take her a moment to calm down. But I told her I wanted to know the story as soon as she was ready to talk about it.
She responded, “If I didn’t love her and think of her as my wife, I would have called the police.”
Wow. Not what I was expecting. She went on to tell me that our wife had tried to initiate sex and Liz had said no. She tried a second time and Liz very firmly told her that she wasn’t in the mood and it wasn’t going to happen. Then after a third time, and another clear refusal from Liz, she tried to force herself on her.
I was shocked. “Did she rape you?” I asked. I didn’t want to throw out the word rape too casually, as it’s a serious thing, but it was sounding like that’s where Liz was going with this. She shook her head and said it was more like attempted rape. I said that’s really just as bad. She went on to say that she pushed our wife away and started to punish her, but she was still persistent and even got a finger inside of her.
“She penetrated you?” I asked. Liz nodded. I was getting angry. I told her that sounded like rape to me. I told her I would completely support her calling the police if she wanted to do that. She shook her head and said she feels like she’s taken care of it. I asked her how she was feeling. Getting raped isn’t something to just brush off like nothing happened.
We talked for a long time. I offered support and comfort and love. All the while I was feeling more and more angry with our wife. We talked about the punishment she had given her. I told her I wanted to add something to the punishment.
We walked into the bedroom together. Our wife was still laying on the bed, bruised ass in the air. I got close to her and said, “I hear that you raped Liz today.” I wanted to use the word rape and see how she reacted to me saying that. She definitely cringed. I told her that I didn’t want anything to do with her until she started seeing a therapist for sexual aggression.
We talked about it for a bit. I certainly don’t want to share a bed with a rapist and I really don’t want to be in a relationship with a rapist. But given our history, I’m willing to work through this if she is willing to seek professional help. She reluctantly agreed.
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