Progress Report in Magical Realism
- Nov. 19, 2015, 12:19 p.m.
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- Public
So after all that I ate well for the rest of the work day with intent of going to HIIT and yoga after work, then grocery shopping for healthy foods and early bed before SWIM PRACTICE. Instead I got caught up in work stuff, missed class and met A for dinner. When I got there A was at the bar and had a vodka soda waiting for me (at my own request mind you, because it was the end of happy hour and I am a MAXIMIZER.) We ate at the bar and I started off decently with a grilled chicken salad. Then we had another round (again not a surprise, they were buy one get one, from happy hour) and THEN the bartender asked us to do a shot of Jameson with him. (And how can we say no to shots of something neither of us even like that, because it’s FREE? Ugh.) That turned into martinis at our local because we were just so immersed in our conversation and each other. Which then turned into a cup of tea at home which in theory is great but in reality we ended up ignoring the tea and just ravaging each other for two hours. Which again, in theory is great but maybe not the best idea from 1-3am on a Monday night.
Tuesday morning we of course missed swim practice. Other than that, it was a surprisingly productive day work-wise but really only fueled by necessity caused by procrastination to that point. There was nothing in the house to eat so A came home and bought pizza (on my request!) I did some more work and we went to bed early.
This morning I woke up before my alarm, in plenty of time for swim practice, and just lay there. I don’t know what the EFF IS WRONG WITH ME.
My friend from grad school posted a great quote, here it is:
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.
One is Evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”
He continued, “The other is Good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
I feel like my Evil wolf has eaten my Good wolf whole.
Last updated November 19, 2015
Leslie Bruce ⋅ November 19, 2015
Oh my gosh, I love that quote. It really symbolizes how I feel sometimes too. I'm going to save it! Thank you!
nightborn ⋅ November 19, 2015
I'm the same way. I freaking KNOW what I need to do and yet when it comes time to do it, I find myself almost paralyzed by inaction. I know you will do what it takes to find yourself in a good place again. I will too, eventually... change is hard!
P.S. re your previous entry, I refuse to believe you are obnoxious when you're drunk. :-P
Satine nightborn ⋅ November 19, 2015
It's horrible, my voice goes up like 2 octaves and I am just annoying. Ask K, I'm surprised she didn't ditch me in the Baltics ;)
nightborn Satine ⋅ November 20, 2015
Well during dinner we were talking about all of us going on a girls trip, so I think it's safe to say she still loves you. :)
Jigger ⋅ November 19, 2015
Just wait. The good wolf will chew its way out.
Satine Jigger ⋅ November 19, 2015
I love this, I hope so!
Complicated Disaster ⋅ November 19, 2015
Maybe it's all your body telling you to take a break? xx
Satine Complicated Disaster ⋅ November 19, 2015
Maybe, but not sure drinking heavily and staying up all night is taking a break per se? ;)
Complicated Disaster Satine ⋅ November 19, 2015
Haha. A change is as good as a rest?? xx
Wind Swept ⋅ November 19, 2015
I don't think there is anything evil that you did, so i don't think you are feeding the evil wolf....Just living and enjoying life.....
Homebird ⋅ November 19, 2015
I reckon the good wolf is in hibernation for a while, taking a well earned rest, and will wake up refreshed and raring to go very soon xx
nowthat'salady ⋅ November 19, 2015
I love this quote and I'm going to save it.
I have to say, I don't think there's really anything wrong with what you're doing. It might be counter to what your think you want to be doing, but you are doing what you want to be doing, and I think giving into that is not only fun but actually healthy and important. I know with certainty that it won't continue and that you'll be in line soon enough.
sarahbaby. ⋅ November 19, 2015
Dude, your Good Wolf is a goddamn superhero. Let's be serious -- your Evil Wolf has NOTHING on your world-dominating Super Wolf!
plushcreep ⋅ November 19, 2015
Those old Cherokees are wise!
kmh. ⋅ November 19, 2015
What a quote. Here's to the Good Wolf finding its strength xo
Deleted user ⋅ November 19, 2015
Love that quote. Thanks for sharing!
Here's hoping all of our good wolves will prevail.
Deleted user ⋅ November 20, 2015
Keep fighting. I have discovered rather late in life that you have to keep to a routine for several weeks before it becomes automatic. Those first couple of weeks are the hardest to get through and most people have to force themselves, but it will get easier.
incredulity ⋅ November 20, 2015
I've heard that one before but the nationality of the older person always changes. I wonder who said it first!
Booze and pizza and sex and sleep are all soooo hard to say no to, even for swimming.
Deleted user ⋅ November 21, 2015
It sounds like you a deserving of a nice break :)
kiss kitty bang! ⋅ November 22, 2015
God - this entry is ME and MY LIFE at the moment. Where you know what you should be doing but then somehow do the exact opposite and not manage to give any fucks about it.
Hope the pizza was good at least. ;)
dancerd ⋅ November 28, 2015
I love that quote! I don'tknow how you can go out on a mMonday night and drink tons and then do other 'stuff' from 1-3 am and then be normal on Tuesday???
BlueEyedDevil ⋅ December 03, 2015
Hiiiiii! :)
Agreed with the other noters, I can't do ANYTHING from 1-3 am and not then sleep the next day away! Where do you get your energy???
edna million ⋅ December 04, 2015
That is a great quote. Stupid hungry Evil Wolf. Hungry and with very convincing arguments.
SweetMelissa ⋅ December 28, 2015
Of course, the second I read one of your entries I feel the need to swim.
Ravaging from 1-3am is great at the time but my old ass has to sleep until noon to feel normal again. Maybe, if I was swimming I would have more stamina. ;)
SweetMelissa ⋅ December 28, 2015
I know this is an older entry but are you still Dancing with Wolves?
dali ⋅ February 02, 2016
Miss your writing!