My place, 05/22/15 in Ryan

During this week, we were very relationship-y at work. We had lunch together every day and we’d sneak kisses when no one was looking. It was a busy week for both of us in the evenings, though, and we didn’t see each other outside of work. I knew my period was coming and wanted to get some before that started, but I just couldn’t seem to coordinate with anyone online or with Jess.

On Friday, she suggested coming over my place. My periods are very regular, and I suspected it would start on Friday at some point. I was hoping it would hold off. But it started at about lunchtime. I texted Jess an image of the spotting on my panties and she texted back a frowning face.

About an hour later she texted again and said she was happy to just hang out. Then another text that said our relationship didn’t need to be all about sex. Then another that said that she meant was she told me last weekend.

I presume that was a reference to when she said she loves me.

Mixed feelings. I was happy that she loves me. I like having people who love me. But every time she mentioned it it made me uncomfortable because I wasn’t ready to say it back to her.

We spent the whole weekend together, literally from Friday evening until we went back to work on Monday. We mostly just hung out, watched TV, had meals, and got to know each other better. We slept in my bed, but didn’t have sex. It felt so much like a relationship that it scared me. I wanted to be with her, but I didn’t want to stop all the other sex I was having.