Motherhood in Open Book

I love and loathe social media all at the same time…It’s so conflicting.

With that said, I don’t think I’ll stop using it just because others use it in such a negative way ALL the time (I think it can be a good platform for venting here and there, just not on a daily basis). Though sometimes I’m tempted to dump it all.

So many of us use social networking because we CARE about those we know (whether they are having a bad or good day)…We want to support our family and friends through good and bad times. If you don’t care, why use it?!

Anyway, I couldn’t believe how many people were so full of sadness and hate on Mother’s Day…

I certainly DO feel deeply for those who may have been abused (verbally and/or physically by their mother), for those who have lost their mother, for those who have lost a child, for those who are not close to their mother (this category includes myself), and those who deeply long to be a mother to a biological baby.

With that said, if you’re feeling shitty on Mother’s Day (or any other day) for any reason, doesn’t mean you have to rant and rave and try to poop on everyone else…

Not saying you can’t feel upset if you are…Just saying, don’t go out of your way to make others feel horrible.

We are all entitled to our feelings and I fully encourage EVERYONE to experience emotions as they come (as they are all impermanent and will pass)…My point is, don’t be a dick…

I freaking HATE easter with a passion (as most of you know)…Yet, I don’t write public blog articles (well I guess my friends only entries here could be considered “public” but it is never published outside of here) on how it is the most atrocious day of the year and NO ONE should celebrate. I don’t believe it shouldn’t be celebrated simply because “I” don’t like it.

Even on the day I hate the MOST, I do my best to be positive. I fake my best smile, show up to family/friend events, go all out for Eva, and do my best to just make it through the day (it’s only 1 day) with the best attitude possible. I look for the good the day may possess (such as just being in the same room as people I love).

People have the right to celebrate (or not celebrate) whatever they want.

I think many people over look what it REALLY means to be a “Mother.”

To me, a “mother” is a woman who loves deeply (children, animals, people, her community, the planet, and even herself).

A “mother” is woman who enjoys nurturing, helping others, loving, teaching, working hard, following her own dreams (as she encourages others to do the same), treats all people with respect, and generally sets a good example for ALL of those in her life.

Of course she has her tough days (all of us do). “Mothers” are not perfect. Nothing in nature is perfect, yet it works together to create a beautiful balance.

A “mother” always does her best to better herself and all of those she comes in contact with.

Mothers feel the full spectrum of emotions too…We get angry, we cry, we feel a love so deep it is as if our hearts will implode, we laugh, we worry, we regret, we smile, we get “high” on life, we loathe, we battle, we conquer, we fight with all we have, sometimes we give up, we beat ourselves up, we love ourselves, we question ourselves, we feel confidence, we feel pride, we feel fear, we feel peace, we feel anxious, we feel strong, we feel weak, we feel joy, we feel loneliness, we feel rage, we feel content…

To be a mother is to endure a complexity of emotions. A lot of the time, we feel ALL of these things all at once.

Whether you had an un-medicated, medicated, c-section, adoption, or foster birth, we are all equals. No matter which way your child (or animals) came to you, you are NO LESS of a Mother or Woman than a lady who birthed her own baby.

If you contribute to making another life better, you are as equally a mother as woman who held a child in her womb and pushed it into the world.

Even if you don’t have any children in your house at all…If you have aging parents, friends in need, animals, etc. in your home YOU ARE A MOTHER.

Even if you are the only one who dwells within your walls, yet you contribute to the world, YOU ARE A MOTHER.

If you care about the welfare of others, if you fear for the future generations, the health of the environment, and the general welfare of other beings, YOU ARE A MOTHER.

After all, a mothers job is to love, nurture, teach, respect, give back, worry, and SACRIFICE.

A mother generally puts others above herself (though should NEVER take herself for granted or let go of her own passions). A mother balances her own needs as well of the needs of others.

It doesn’t really matter whether you breastfed, formula fed, co-slept, sleep trained, cloth diapered, disposable diapered, bought pre-made food, grow your own food, bought new clothes, or kindly accepted gifts, accepted help, did it on your own, potty trained at a year, potty trained at four years, vaccinated, not vaccinated, work, or stay home.

At the end of the day we all feel the same emotions…We all try our best, we sacrifice, and we do what we need to do to ensure our children and those around us are happy (as well as taking care of our own needs so we have the ability to extend ourselves to others).

We all want the same things…We want healthy, happy, educated, well rounded, children that have the ability to thrive in a healthy and safe environment.

We want our children (and those around us) to progress through life spreading positivity and compassion for all they encounter (after all, our children are an extension of us). We want to leave this world a better place after we leave.

So next Mother’s day, try find a way to celebrate (through my hate of easter I have found it is so much easier to try and celebrate rather than spend the day being negative and spewing hate into the Universe)…

I’m sure EVERYONE at one point in their life had an inspirational woman in his or her life (a Grandma, a Sister, a Cousin, an Aunt, a Teacher, a Friend, a Mentor, a Counselor, or even an idol whom you’ve never met).

For those who may have had no one…I encourage you to search within yourself and come up with a way on how YOU can be a better Mother than the one you had. How can YOU contribute happiness to others?

Maybe you can join Big Brothers/Big Sisters (or similar organization) and take a child who doesn’t have a mother in his/her life to celebrate (let a child know that even though life may be unfair sometimes, there will always be someone there taht understands and is willing to support you)…

Maybe adopt an animal in need, help clean up a park (give to Mother Earth), and so on…There are so many ways to celebrate Mother’s Day.

Actions speak so much louder than words…If you can make a child, an animal, or the Earth a better place (even for just a day), you are fulfilling the role of a good Mother.

I don’t mean to take away from Father’s (you get your day of recognition next month). I feel that this can all be applied to men as well).

So thank you to all the Mothers (and Fathers) out in the world trying to make it a better place for themselves and everyone else.

Thank you for your sacrifices and your dedications. Each of you is wonderful.