Maybe I should rename this part of my book.
I should have known that as the semester would progress, the workloads would start mounting up. The first 2 weeks were pretty light. As soon as we started picking up and the meat started coming in to the curriculum- I know that it was going to be more of a struggle to keep this up and keep that up as well. There was a reason I kinda set dance on a back burner this semester in regards to performing. Performance takes an enormous amount of energy and time. The time that I have is very precious and is required by work- which work is very correlated to the industry that I want to get in to.
The Beat Down part of my journal is documenting all news comic related. I want to insert clips and pics with the beat journal. Like today, just a few hours ago, Spider-man will be joining the Marvel Cinematic Universe (or MCU, as those in the industry like to call it). Sony has green-lighted the project to introduce Spidey to the MCU as well as create new movies that are directed by Kevin Feige of Marvel and Disney repute. This will integrate the web-crawler into the MCU and hopefully bring Sony a bit more eye traffic than it’s disappointing Amazing Spider-man 2.
This is huge news for fanboys like myself, because we’ve been looking for some significant canon with the storyline, especially for the Civil War chapters of Captain America, and the Infinity War soon to come (in which, a crazy amount of Marvel Comics Characters involved).
I’ll cover more of that in the Beat Down though. I’m here to talk about my personal day.
Modern dance was more exhausting than most days. Last week I felt like I was at the fullest extent of my extremities. My legs could go out for days and my arms could swath all four walls of any room size. The sphere of my influence was wide and broad- and I had enough energy in me to cover it all. The problem today was that I wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t feel like I was giving it my all and having all of me in the dance routines, in the exercises- in anything. My arms were down, my legs were tight, my body was limp. I felt like a ragged doll attempting to wander the forests as a dancer rather than the brave and gallant knight looking to find his or her Valhalla and to move within it as he or she freely will.
That wasn’t the weird part though. The weird part is my feelings, which I will discuss here more than any other site.
I had a weird moment after class. There’s a few girls in the class which is cool. I talk with them and they talk with me, and we go over the exercises and try to get a feel for what’s being asked of us and where legs go and what counts and movement transitions, blah blah blah. Right. With that said, after class we walk together until we get to certain points. Two of the younger ones left to a parking lot off in the distance. I left with a girl to a separate parking lot, and we get around to talking. She was a dancer in High School, and she competed. I figured this because her technique was crazier better than mine. I told her that i was a bit jealous of her, because after only a few classes I could tell she had better training than me, and even after my 2 1/2 years of dance, she would have the one-up on me. With that said, I knew my bike was off in another direction, but I played it off like my bike was around where she parked.
I got her to her vehicle, and said “Oh, I guess my bike isn’t here.”
“Really, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have dragged you over here.” she replied.
“Don’t be. At least I walked you to your car.”
“Oh thank you! Well, I’ll see you Wednesday!”
Then comes the weird part.
We both do the step-in. It’s the special step-in where we’re going for a hug. But as we do it, we both look each other in the eyes and realize, we only just really met today. And we step back, and do the awkward walk away.
Heck, I think to myself, I don’t even know her name.
So I reply back as I awkwardly walk away, “Ok, see you Wednesday… Veronica?” “Victoria. And you’re…“
“Donald. Oh, you’ve got the same name as my Jazz teacher. Your name should be easy to remember.”
“Yeah. I don’t know any Donalds. So you’re name will be easy to remember too.”
All the while as I’m walking back to my car, I’m thinking, what in the hell just happened?
I don’t believe in love at first sight, but it’s hard to put out from my mind the fact that that just happened, and she is quite a beautiful woman on top of it. I’d hate to be smitten when I didn’t need to be, when I don’t really want to be. However, my mind is plagued with thoughts such as perhaps this is something that’s been waiting in the wings for me, or perhaps this is some sort of test that will strengthen my resolve for what’s really important in my life.
It sucks to have all of these perhappenings all over my mind. It causes confusion and then my goals become warped and dreams get all twisted…
speaking of dreams- my eyes are getting heavier the more I try to think on this. Hopefully I can have a better sleep with the conflict raging in my head finally put to rest and it subsides.
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