Started to write an entry about all the other great stuff that happened over the weekend. I got a paragraph written early this morning because I had to leave for work extra early (at 6:30!!!) because I had to pick up part of a project as a favor for a new guy at work. Not sure how I got myself into that one, but I did. So I obviously didnt have time to write an entry before 6:30 am.
Anyway. I was playing around on the computer last night. Wrote my last entry and searched for good negotiating tips, etc. At around 8:30 or so, my phone rang and I noticed that it was LDL. I hesitated picking up because I knew that wed eventually wind up talking about my probable move and I just wasnt in the mood to get into it with him. I knew we would end up going round and round. And I just wanted to spend the evening relaxing. I ignored the phone call.
When I got up this morning, there were two more missed phone calls from LDL. I decided to just ignore them again and check them in the car on my way to work. Well, I got so caught up in thinking about other things that I forgot to check the messages. Theres so much swirling around in my brain these days.
When I got into the office, I knew I needed to get prepared for an 8:30 staff meeting, so I went straight to Mr. Peepers office and got some things started. When I came back to my cubicle, my voice mail light was on, so I decided to check it.
It was LDL. He sounded desperate to get in touch with me. Unfortunately, I didnt have time to call him back right then and there. I scrambled to get ready and I could hear the phone ringing off the hook, but I had to run from room to room and gather samples, etc. Finally, my administrative assistant came running up to me to tell me that LDL was on her line and it was urgent.
Okay. I told her to forward the call to me. When the call came through, he was horribly upset. He had been robbed at gunpoint on Sunday. Long story. Sickening story. The robbers killed his beloved dog. The poor dog was protecting LDL. And the fuckers killed him. That dog was LDL’s best friend.
LDL was taken and tied up and forced down on the bathroom floor and held at gunpoint for what he said was an hour and a half. He thought for sure he was dead. He told me that he needed to talk to me later and to tell me all of the things that he thought about while lying face down on that floor.
I cried on the phone with him this morning. All I could muster was, Im sorry. Im sorry. Im so sorry.
And I ache with guilt that I avoided him last night.
And Im not sure what to do because I dont know how to console him. And Im certainly not going to broach all of my issues. Especially the subject of moving somewhere besides Berkeley.
And Im so horrified and sad.
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