Sprung in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)

Damn. It’s raining so hard this morning. The parking lot was flooded when I got to work. I literally waded across the lot and up the steps into the building. My pants were soaking wet, so I had to change. Luckily, I work in an environment where I have extra pants just hanging around. I’m not going to explain. You can figure it out…or not.

You should see it in here. Everyone is completely in slow motion. The coffee doesn’t seem to be working around here. We are all dragging ass. I’ve spent most of my morning trying to get organized and then waiting for the mail guy to come around with my packages for the day. Eh. Maybe it’s just me.

SO! The weekend brought fun and a tiny bit of adventure. Wish it could have lasted a little longer.

Let’s start with Friday night. For the first time in a long time, I actually went out and did something inspiring: the monthly art gallery crawl. My first mission was…well, first it was to meet Jen and Tina from work for a cocktail, and then it was off to a gallery opening where another guy from work has some sculptures on display. Loved his stuff so much. I was completely floored by the fact that he’s only been doing this for about four years. And I would guess that he’s in his mid- to late-50s. Guess it shows that it’s never too late to hone latent skills. I have all of these ideas swirling around in my squishy little brain that I’d love to try, but I think I’ve been telling myself not to for some reason. It’s really just a matter of finding the time. I asked him where he finds the time to do his stuff after long days at the office and with his family and all that. He told me that it’s hard, but he just makes it a priority in his life. He just does it. Makes sense. I am inspired.

The rest of the evening was spent wandering a bit. Met some other people at another gallery opening. Bought a couple of little pieces that were unbelievably affordable and that will be perfect for the new loft space (crossing fingers still…). Hung out with some of Jen’s friends for a while. They were nice and all, but Tina and I really wanted to go somewhere where there were at least a couple of straight men, and it wasn’t going to happen if we stayed with them. So we broke away from the crowd and found a new little bar that we thought was interesting.

Once inside, I ran smack into Mr. Unmentionable. He’s a guy I went out with a couple of times about a year ago. We fizzled out when he told me that he already had plenty of friends. He didn’t want another friendship out of me…that it was either boyfriend/girlfriend or nothing at all with him. I chose the nothing part and cut my losses. So. He was there and we chatted for a while and then he told me that he felt badly about the way things had ended with us. I kind of questioned his bad feelings because I thought that we’d both been very straightforward and honest. I didn’t think he harbored ill feelings. But he did.

He told me that he thought he’d been kind of mean about the whole thing. I don’t think he was particularly mean, but I thought he was fairly forceful with his ultimatum, so again, I just backed off and let it all go. For that, he thought I was kind of a bitch. At least this is what he informed me of on Friday night. If that’s being a bitch…well then, damn.

And that got me to thinking about how people perceive me. Or maybe just about how I react to certain things. Do I think I’m the nicest person in the world? Definitely not. But a bitch? Could I possibly handle things differently sometimes? Sure. But to say that I’m a bitch because I didn’t react a certain way to a sticky situation? I’m a bitch because I let something go without a fight? Was it perceived as turning a cold shoulder? Should I have fought for something I didn’t believe in? Or maybe just had a stronger reaction? Should I have shown a little more emotion? Should I have cried? What? I don’t get it.

It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that I don’t have the energy to put into something that’s not worth a fight. Let it go. So I did. I called it a night.

Saturday was wonderful. Warm and delicious. Went to a giant party on Saturday night. Renee was there with some guy (not Paul!), and all seemed right with the world. It appeared Lyn and Renee were on a double date with these two cuties. And the cuties had a friend. And spring was in the air and the vibes were just right.

And dammit, I have to cut this short because I need to run to a meeting. Let’s just say I think I had a spring fling….

More later.