Boy oh Boy oh Boy (or Girl?) in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)

Yes. I’m off the pill. After many further discussions with TFMS, we decided that we would try. Just try…not go overboard. If it happens, it happens. If not, we’re NOT going to do the fertility stuff. We’re just going to let what will be, be.

But after reading that note from [Luna] about how she got pregnant the first time she had sex after going off the pill, I kinda freaked out. Then I did a little more research online, and yes, it’s certainly possible. I thought my body would take a little time to adjust, you know? Like months. Apparently, it could do just that. OR it could just go into full-force baby making mode.

I know, I know. I need to make an OB/GYN appt. STAT (Please don’t leave me a note telling me how naïve I am, okay? I realize that I’m a bit uneducated in the ways of fertility at 40, yes. And I know there could be complications. And I know there’s more involved than simply popping out a child. And that this entry probably deserves more explanation. But I can’t explain. I’m willing to make an effort and so is TFMS and here we are right now).

I also need to make contingency plans regarding work and travel and all that. I also need to mentally prepare myself…because it’s going to go either way—either I will or I won’t get pregnant and I know I’m opening a million cans of worms here.

I simply can’t BELIEVE that I’m in this place right now! It’s exciting and scary and…wow.

WHAT IF I’M PREGNANT RIGHT NOW?!?!

[deep breath, deep breath]