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Oct. 14, 2008, midnight
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The Story. In Parts. is long and tedious. Thats a clue.
Ive become very attached to TMG. At this point, I dont know what Id do without him. We text first thing in the morning. We usually text right before we both go to bed. Its weird. I love him in a way. It doesnt matter how low I get, hes been there for me through this whooooooole breakup and Im terribly thankful. I owe him. I really wish I wanted to date him
or even
whatever with him. Hes a bit frustrated with that part of it, but sticks around. He promised hed see me through this and so far hes kept his promise. That says a lot about him.
I forgot to tell you this part: Yes, TMG started dating someone. I could tell he liked her because he backed off of me, yet never left me in the lurch or crying somewhere in a back alley. He was still texting and making sure I was OK
just a bit preoccupied. But it didnt work out with her. And now I have his full attention again. I dont know if its a good thing or a not-so-great thing considering Im not sure what to do with him, but
I went to the State Fair on Sunday with TMG, his dad, his kids, and his ex-wife. It wasnt weird at all. It reminded me a LOT of doing stuff with EXMS, his kids and his ex
except this time I was fine with the whole thing. Back then (with EXMS), it bothered me so much to have to be friends with the ex-wife. I fought it. I let it eat at me. Maybe I have learned lessons from my failed relationship after all. Or maybe Im just less uptight with TMG. Plus, we’re not dating, right?
I did cheat my way around Facebook (fucking loopholes) and found a couple more photos of EXMS and his new love. Again, more replacement photos. Shes in the EXACT same position as I was two years ago. Its almost scary. It tore me apart one day. I cant decide if its worth my energy to get angry, but I need something to replace that sadness that I feel. Sometimes it just smacks me in the face and I simply cant believe hes gone. And that he left soooooo easily.
I have to let go. Please let go.
I have found some old friends on Facebook, and that is rocking me so hard! How cool is it to get back in touch with people you havent seen in 20 years?
Work is kicking my ass. Ive been staying late and (sometimes) coming in early. I feel like Im scrambling a lot and my boss (the awesome boss!) is moody and stressed and coming down hard on me. Damn economy. Please turn around. Between traveling and staying long hours, work is taking a big bite into my social life.
But I manage to fill my calendar in the off-hours. I have the gym tonight and then TMG wants to hang out for a while. Dinner with Matt on Wednesday night, a wine-tasting event on Thursday night, and another dinner event on Friday night. Saturday? Who knows. I might not even do anything. What a treat!
I really need to work on the homestead. I havent let anyone into my living space since EXMS left (except for mom, dad, and a couple of family-close friends). Weird
like its sacred or something. It keeps me a bit lonely, and Im tired of it. A small party would be nice for a change.
Speaking of parties, TMG is hosting a party at his place next week. I told him that it could be my BIRTHDAY party! I was just joking, and he was all, OK!!! Its a masquerade party. Fun! More details to follow, Im sure.
Also going to a Halloween party with Lovely L. and Anna (whos coming to town!). I dont have any details, just that Im supposed to dress. I have no clue what to do. My friend Cindy says I should be Catwoman. I kind of like that idea, as long as nobody confuses cat with cougar. Ick.
I forgot to send an email to the photographer I got drunk with last Thursday. Hed wrapped his scarf around my neck at some point, and I found it tangled up with some clothes over the weekend. Wow. Havent been that hammered in forever. Im glad I did it because it was FUNNNNNN, but I paid for it pretty much all weekend. Maybe Ill do that now
Actually, I have lots and LOTS more work to do, so that takes care of what to do now!
More story to follow! Its good, I promise
it just takes a long time to tell. Meanwhile, life goes on!
Last updated 5 days ago
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