PIC OF THE DAY!
Aaaah, amore! From a trip last year in Milan. There were several billboards depicting love all around the Duomo.
TODAY…
1. Thankful that my interview last week went well…as well as I could have expected.
2. Thankful for some more delicious times with CC
3. Thankful I have my dear friends who give me AMAZING viewpoints and advice when I ask for it.
4. Thankful for the leatherwork.
5. Thankful that I’m always, always learning and discovering new things.
Sorry I’ve been absent. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and dreaming and planning and cleaning. Well, I need to be doing more of the cleaning and less of the dreaming, but oh well.
MAN!! I sure can go off the deep end, can’t I? I’ve been thinking a lot about my spins. They get so irrational when blurred by sex and romance and questions about the future.
CC is in Mexico. He’s on a trip with his wine tasting buddies. These are rich guys who take off on long weekends simply to guzzle cases of insanely expensive vinos and gorge themselves on local delicacies. I wonder what they talk about? I mean, I know that these are all powerful businessmen and wine enthusiasts, so I know they talk business and wine (oh and football!), but I wonder if they get down to the nitty gritty like we women do? Do they talk about relationships and looovvvee? I’ll have to find out.
For those of you wondering, we’ve talked. Let me tell you. In addition to owning several restaurants and some other businesses on the side, CC is also an attorney. AND he was an English major in undergrad. He has a way with words and he knows how to use them to his advantage. Let’s just say, he can talk around anything.
And though I know now that he’s not having sex/dating anyone else, I do not have a clear picture of what’s happening here. I am SUCH a pushover sometimes and I MUST get this under control. STAT.
We’ve not done the deed…yet. But I’ll tell you that we’ve done pretty much everything but. And while I don’t feel guilty about any of it (in fact, it’s been goooood), I almost feel like my heart’s already in it like we have.
So I’m now at a disadvantage. And while I know that I shouldn’t really look at this like a game, I also know that if I want this to turn into something, I need to do it strategically. Man, all this energy spent–for something that could possibly end at a moment’s notice. I suppose it’s the same as anything else, right? I could blow an interview. Or I could blow the next rounds of interviews, ya know? And then I’d be back to square one.
I’m going to try to look at it in that way. I’m also going to try to relax a little bit and enjoy. I mean, I don’t see no ring on this finger. Why can’t I get back out there and take a look around at the OTHER possibilities?
Yes, I’m all over the place right now.
Bottom line, I’ve got to get my shit together.
Look, I know he really likes me. He’s been texting me like crazy from Mexico, telling me what they’re doing, how the wine is “showing”, sending me sweet nothings, giving me ideas about possible future trips with him…
But I think he might also be placating me. He sent me an email telling me all about how things are looking up this year and that I’m part of a major shift in his life and that I make him smiiiiile. But he also added some things that in re-reading feel a little patronizing: “You’re such a nice girl!” *pat on the head*
And honestly, sometimes I wonder if I should even ask for more. I mean look, I’m just barely done with crying every single day over my ex-fiance. Am I CRAZY to want a boyfriend?
ARGGGHH! See where I go?
In other news, the interview on Thursday seemed to go quite well. I can’t really get a read on everything. I met with three people (HR, Hiring Manager, and HM’s boss), and I really connected with them all. I like getting face-to-face time because I feel like I show much better in person.
I know the HM personally, so that’s a good thing. But she told me that they are going through some new hiring procedures and that she HAD to ask me certain questions and that I was the guinea pig. Oh boy. These were not easy questions either, and they had a negative spin to them. I don’t know if I answered in the way she wanted to hear, but I was as honest as I could be. And then we shot the shit a bit. And then I wanted to show her some stuff from my portfolio, but we got interrupted and she split!
The HM’s boss was awesome! I really enjoyed speaking with her, and she was a very impressive woman. I can tell she’d be hardcore, but totally has her shit together (unlike Boss Party Pants, who tends to look a little crazy no matter if she’s drunk or not).
I had to take two tests! They were kind of hard core math and verbal skills and aptitude tests. It took me an hour to get them done and then I spoke with HR again. I know I’m against an internal candidate, and that kind of sucks.
And this interview process goes in rounds, so when I get invited back I’ll be interviewing with team members. I think probably four more people.
I know I really want this job, though. I know I would do a good job. I also know this is a HARD job. Everyone has told me so and I’ve been in this position before. I ALSO know that I would already want my boss’s position when I start, and that’s something to strive for.
I’m ready. It’s time to start working again. Everyone I talk with has a strong feeling about this one. Please keep fingers and toes crossed, thanks!
Okay. Need to get ready for the day at the studio. Lots to do! I’m excited about today. My friend Annie (not Anna…grrr…should have chosen a better pseudonym) is flying in today (finally got my dates straight), and we’ll be going to dinner.
Missed you!! And I love you!
XO
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