I’m in Hong Kong. I’ve been up since 2am. Jetlagged. PMS. Not a good combination…not at all. It’s now approaching 6am. Going to be an interesting day indeed. I have three big meetings in two different cities. Going into China today and will be there for two more weeks.
I am angry about something and I need to get it out here. See, I added two extra personal days to this trip because SexyPants told me that he wanted to come along on part of this trip. SP used to live in Shanghai, so he wanted to come visit with me and see some old friends.
We’ve been talking about this for months. He told me how much he wanted to come and now he’s backing out because he ran out of time to work with Singapore Airlines (he used to have tons and tons of miles on their rewards program and is losing them over time). Long story, but the short end of it is this: I have been put on the back burner. He has made all of this time to do a million different things, start companies, take care of his son, deal with his ex-wife, go on motorcycle trips with the boys, etc. etc. and I have been getting the short end of the stick–including having to suck up and stay in China for two extra days.
Not the end of the world, no. Of course not. But the bottom line is, his commitments to me seem tentative and conditional every time. Do you remember Morocco? Yes, he had promised to come with me on that trip as well. Kid problems arose and I was more than understanding. But now? Kid is away in his program. He just can’t seem to pull this one off. I am more than disappointed.
I don’t know you guys. Is this even worth a discussion with him or am I being overly sensitive? I do know that the only way that I’m going to get out of this funk is to enjoy, enjoy, enjoy my time, but I’m just so bummed right now. Is this the way it’s going to be for the rest of our relationship?
I just don’t know.
All I know is that I’m exhausted and need to take a walk outside. I have ants in my pants. I should go for a run.
I’ll be back.
Ginger
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