Whelp. I started an entry at work and didn’t finish. Boo.
I have been pretty checked out at work the last couple of weeks. It’s so strange. I better keep myself super busy in case this gig doesn’t work out. In fact, I hadn’t heard anything from the recruiter guy who told me that he’d call me on Monday to set up a pre-interview time with me before Friday. Yes, today is Wednesday. He hadn’t called ANY of my references.
I called him tonight just to check in. Guy sounds super busy. And that’s fine. But come on, man. Stick with your commitments. I suppose he’s working on the next big prospect, right?
Oh well. We’ve set up a phone appointment for tomorrow.
I also have a getting-to-know-you appointment with my boss’s boss tomorrow. She took over my area a couple of months ago and wants to get to know all of her reports, direct and indirect. So,,,I have an our going over my work history, etc. with her.
Then 4 interviews on Friday. Exhausting. Kind of tired of all this.
Why can’t I be a kept woman??
When we got engaged, SexyPants used to tell me that I wouldn’t have to work if I didn’t want to after we were married. Or he would help me set up a business so that I could work from home if I wanted. Or I could just have spa day every day. Whatever I wanted.
I never even entertained that thought. I mean, nice fantasy, but really? I thought it was ridiculous and that he was kidding. I mean, he still pays his ex-wife to do just that (though she recently took a part-time job). Why would he even say that to me? I still kinda wonder. I think I’ll ask him when he comes home.
I guess it was kind of a wonderful security blanket, you know? To think that if for some reason I lost my job I wouldn’t have to freak out like I kinda did when I was fired that time. It certainly made me stress a lot less to know that I had the safety net of a husband who could take care of me. It was a nice feeling.
I don’t feel that way any more. I don’t feel like he would always take care of me. I mean, we didn’t get married, did we? And he has bigger, needier responsibilities – a mentally ill son. Were we just playing around until reality came along and smacked us both?
Don’t get me wrong, SP brings me JOY when we are together. I am truly, geniunely happy. He treats me like a gem and spoils me and makes me laugh and laugh and belly laugh. We always, ALWAYS have tons of fun together. I LOVE spending time with him.
But I am also simply enjoying our moments together without all of this great expectation. Maybe that’s what it’s all about. We meet certain needs with each other, yet we take care of ourselves?
Just some thoughts.
Still, would be nice to be completely taken care of, eh?
Well, got some business to attend to.
Love and XXOO!
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