Written by William Forbes
“Star-crossed lovers? Yeah, right.”
Ah, my girlfriend. Ever the romantic.
“All this stuff about comitting suicide, just because they could not live without each other. If any guy wanted to do that for me, I’d tell him to fuck off.”
Well, actually I would. Now you have some idea as to why I have not told her this.
My girlfriend is the first to admit that she does not have a romantic bone in her body. I have stopped giving her flowers, cooking for her and giving her presents ‘just because’. She does not believe in celebrating Valentines Day, saying that it is ‘just a con, a way to boost sales of flowers and chocolate’.
I suppose marriage is out of the question?
“And what about the people they left behind. Their families? Didn’t they worry about what this would do to them?”
Again, she shoots, she misses by miles. If it was not for the families, they would not have had to take this course of action in the first place, would they?
“Nah, I just don’t buy into it. All that fucking romantic stuff. It sickens me, it really does.”
Yet, I am a romantic at heart. How did I end up with her? She walked up to me in a nightclub and asked if I wanted to shag her. Romatic? Well, no, but then, yadda, yadda, yadda. You’ve heard this bit before.
Anyway, I fell head over heals for her, she decided I was too good in bed to give up, so we got together.
“Well. That’s what I thought anyway.”
Huh?
“Then I saw you here. Knowing that there is no help on it’s way. And I realised something for the very first time. I love you.”
Well, I love you to babe, but I’m laying on the ground with a huge fucking hole in my chest. You’ve just told me I will die. Your timing could have been slightly better, no?
“And now your going to die.”
Tell me something I don’t know. Hang on, everything is going dark. My hearing is fuzzy.
“I can’t live without you. So we go together. I love you. Hopefully, I’ll still love you in the next world.”
She kisses me. And the last thing I see before I black out is the knife piercing her heart.
Will
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