One of the lazier workers in the office, a work group assistant named Scummy, took it upon herself to start decorating the west side entrance of the building with Christmas stuff all the way back in late November, the week after Thanksgiving, if I'm not mistaken. No one told her to do it. She just did it, which for her, is very odd considering how lazy she normally is. She had even gone so far as to put up a full-sized tree, complete with white branches that looked painted on or which may have been doused with correction fluid, and various other adornments. I imagine that Scummy was pretty proud of herself for the way she exerted herself, in a non-work capacity at that, and that her immediate coworkers probably patted her on the back for her efforts. Whatever. I don't think that Scummy or the job she did were all that great to begin with. Regardless, why is it that now, well past the halfway point of January, are all those damn decorations still up? Scummy proudly put all that shit together. It's about time she proudly take that shit down. With the way that things are going, I'm thinking that none of that shit will be taken down before February. I barely see Scummy anyway, which I'm not upset about, because she's about as lazy as they come and I have no reason to interact with her. But for the life of me, why can't she just resurface from the mud pit where she tends to hide and take all that shit down? It's almost February already, damn.
Gaby is another one of the many work group assistants that have infected the office since the beginning of 2023, though she's nowhere near as lazy or as worthless as Scummy. While Scummy is utterly worthless, Gaby is just kind of there. I don't work with her and I'm in no hurry to do so. I treat Gaby like all the other work group assistants in the office, in that I don't rely on her for anything and I have no reason to think that she is competent to do anything I might ask her. I don't even greet or acknowledge those work group assistants, Gaby included. I pretty much act like they don't exist. At least to me, they don't.
Gaby came into the office ridiculously early yesterday, just after 5am, by my guess. She and Melissa were going on some kind of work-related road trip and were expecting to be gone for a good eight or 10 hours and they needed to get an early start on the day and that long-ass drive. I don't know what Gaby was doing when she parked her car and got out, but I'm estimating that maybe about 30 minutes after she and Melissa left the office and made their way up north to somewhere in Northern California, security approaches me and asks me:
Do you drive a Toyota Camry?
I don't. I drive that old Honda out there.
This guy knows that I get to the office early damn near every day, to where I'm almost convinced that he knows very well what my Honda looks like. Still, I don't mess with him or give him any kind of smart answer, being that I consider him to be a decent guy, though I will admit that I don't know his name. Anyway, he tells me that, as he's making his rounds in the employee parking lot, he noticed a large key ring on the windshield of a Toyota Camry. Yes, ON the windshield along the bottom, not inside the vehicle on the dashboard. On top of the windshield, along the driver's side. I don't know why she put her keys down on the windshield, but that's where Mr. Security Man would find her keys. I saw the key ring too. It had more trinkets and decorative crap on it than actual keys. I imagine that when she drives, all of that crap on the key ring has to bang into her right leg as the car is in motion. I keep a small and simple key ring, with no more than one small decoration, so that I can fit the whole thing comfortably in my pocket. Gaby and I are obviously of differing mindsets, as far as key rings go anyway. Eventually, it was confirmed that the Camry and the keys found on it belonged to Gaby. Gaby was understandably grateful that her keys were found and that some transient didn't stumble upon those keys before security did and possibly even take off with her car. Yup, Gaby dodged a major bullet there, but I have to think that that entire situation was preventable.
Rumor has it that Gaby, in another situation involving keys (not her own, but instead those belonging to one of the department's vehicles), had been involved in an incident while at work where she was in a public restroom and she had somehow managed to flush said department keys down the toilet. How one flushes keys down a toilet is beyond me, but apparently, Gaby did that very thing.
These are merely two instances of the kinds of dumb things that the office's work group assistants get themselves involved in. I continue to have zero faith in these assistants and truly wish that they were never hired on. Often, I think that the department created that position as a form of community outreach, where people in the neighborhood, without degrees nor a measure of sense, can be brought in to work in an office environment where their ineptitude can be put on full display for all to see and we can all witness up close and firsthand how dumb and lazy they are.
The department consistently claims that the budget is short and that funds are tight, but yet, there's enough money available to pay these worthless assistants to sit at their cubicles and spend days on end on TikTok or social media.
Of course, sometimes while they're in the middle of their work day, they might flush car keys down the toilet or leave keys ON their car's windshield.
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