Black Friday in scarlet_dragon

Another Black Friday is here and almost gone. The holidays are hard when you’re a shopaholic and everything is catered to wanting you to spend, spend, spend. I’ll see things I really want for myself and they’re on such a good deal I need it. But the thing is…I don’t need it. I don’t need any of it. I’m living proof right now of having too many things. It’s starting to get me really worked up. Every corner of this house has a pile of something that’s mine.
I had a good 2 hours here that I could have worked on some things but I dicked around and watched one and a half episodes of a show on Netflix. I ordered food delivery, and I did pick up two things and put them away. But yea. I’m suppose to be ordering the last of the things I wanted to get for my son and husband. but I keep putting it off because that’ll be a 700.00 charge if I wind up getting my son a Nintendo switch 2. I don’t know.
700 on myself for bullshit pointless crap I don’t need, I don’t blink an eye. 700 on other people and suddenly I have pause. That should tell me something right there.
I just started getting a headache thinking of all the things that need done and I then freeze and do none of them. We will probably have to go tomorrow to get groceries. I haven’t written out any plans for upcoming dinners.
I really need to stop spending on things that I think would make my life better and invest in myself more. Not things but that money go towards doctors I need to see, like pelvic floor therapist and an emotional therapist and things of that that nature.
The stuff just stresses me out anyways.
The problem with me with “things” is I’ll clear an area and get rid of some things and then I feel the need to fill it with something else.
Half finished craft projects, ideas I bought things for but never even started. Gather dust. Things brand new unopened just wasting away.
I know I need to buckle down and spend a chunk of time just devoted to one area in the house and do it that way. Instead of this bouncing around moving things here or there then quitting 15 mins into the project.
I need 6 totes brought up of holiday items so I can finish decorating. I need to clear the things out that need donated and just go do it already. I was in the basement and my husband old computer has sat there for almost two years, I have an old iPad that needs wiped and just recycled and I’m sure my son has a lot of tech that just needs donated too. All these projects.
Anyways, like usual I’ve wasted time here just scrolling doing nothing.
I’ve been trying to copy paste my entire OD over to save. I’m barely a year and a half into 13 years worth. I don’t know if I’ll make the end of Jan 2026 deadline to shut off but I did know I’d be upset and pissed at myself if I didn’t try to save it all.
My husband was like why don’t you just pick and chose the highlights..Well I would if I could remember where any of those are. So for right now it’s copy and paste. I can seem to get through a year in a day and a half if I devote like 2 hours to it.
It’s not helping my emotional state when I’m trying to do this project either and will see the early start of my relationship with my husband either. The whole love and puppies and nothing wrong with the world. I never could have prepared myself for where we’d be today. This year took it out of me for sure.
So yea seeing this young 21 year old with no big issues in her life before the wind got knocked out of her sails is a lot, yea.