Forever in scarlet_dragon

It’s been what feels like a very long time since I wrote in here. The last month to two months has just been all over and honestly since August has been a trudge in my life to just stay above water somedays.
The Friday before the 26th my Mom drove down here to stay Friday and Saturday and then we left on Sunday to go back up to her house in Ohio. I was dealing with getting a pretty nasty cold about a week before she showed up so the Thursday before she showed up I went to an Urgent Care place because I was concerned about possibly having a sinus infection. I didn’t want to leave out of town and also risk getting her sick before surgery.
The urgent care place gave me a steroid and an antibiotic. The “doctor” there looked in my ears and said the right one was impacted. Which is why I also went to Urgent Care because I was getting a buzz/ringing noise in my ears. He said they’d bring someone in to clean my ear out.
Well this girl I feel confident in saying probably didn’t know how to do it too well. It was the worse experience ever. Hurt so bad and I was extremely dizzy. He said only the right ear needed it but she did both and they gave me ear drops to use later too. Well my hearing wasn’t quite right after leaving there and I think she didn’t get everything from my right ear. The next day I used the drops in one ear and I couldn’t hear for the rest of the day. It was plugged. Cue me freaking out. I was dealing with a cold, stress, my period showed up 2 weeks early, My plugged ears and then I had an ocular migraine. It was a lot.
About 2 weeks have passed now and my ears are both still messed up I have to call my regular doctors next week and see if they can look at them and then set up with an ENT which will probably be a good 4-6 month wait in the meantime. I’m not going back to that Urgent Care. It was kind of a last ditch effort to be seen before I was going out of town. I also knew my doctors wouldn’t have a spot open in the next day or two. I also hate using antibiotics. For the last 10 years anytime I get them I can guarantee it’ll lead to a yeast infection. Which turns out being terrible too.
Now that I’m back home I’m trying to focus on all the rest of the things that need to happen before the end of the year.
I drove with my Mom back to Ohio on the 26th which was my 19th wedding anniversary. I was kinda upset about that. We’ve yet to do anything for it either. I’m waiting to see my son’s work scheduled before I book a nice meal somewhere maybe next week. The husband’s birthday is coming up in about 10 days too which reminds me I haven’t bought him a birthday gift either. not sure if I order something if it’ll be here in time now either.
I’m so behind on things.
I was mostly upset that my mother hadn’t even thanked me for helping her at all before we left. She did finally say it to me at least 3 times then which makes it better. I get it. she needed help but I also am still bitter at my sister for also showing up for the day of surgery and then leaving from there and texting me once to see how our mom was.
I think I had all these plans and expectations of how it would go after and I wound up just sitting in my Mom’s house for most of the time there. I took along reading materials and read basically none of it. I just couldn’t focus in there. It was kinda stressful and anxiety ridden.
I will say it was good that my Mom had been doing 2 miles of walking daily and exercising before all this because I do think it’ll help in her recovery. She’s still got some post surgery issues going on that hopefully resolve themselves here soon.
I did go out a few different times to the stores in the area and spent way too much $$. When I’m stressed out or anxious I tend to drop money left and right. It’s not a good combo. I didn’t do any walking the entire time and I ate horribly. So I feel like I’m back to square one on that hand.
I also asked my husband a week before I left to take care of the car. AKA oil change and a new sticker. Also to take care of a turkey. None of those things happened. The house was thankfully not a mess. The mess now is all my stuff everywhere so I need to get it together and work on it. The weather is nice enough today I think I might grab the ladder and put up the lights on the front porch. Not run the extension cord yet or light them up but they will be done and I won’t have to be out there when it might be pretty cold. Which it was here the entire time I was gone. If it wasn’t so many other things going on here I’d have probably stayed a little longer at my Mom’s but we shall see. She’s in no condition to sit long hours in the car to come here.
I put away Halloween stuff and will probably bring up Christmas stuff soon. Right now it’s just basically Fall decor left. Currently brain dump is focus on getting husband’s birthday gift and making him a cake. Booking dinner reservations. Then the push to finish up at least the extended families Christmas shopping. I have 3 nephews on husband’s side to buy for and then my nephew on my side, then something for my sister and my mom. I had one thing for both of them that I bought and wrapped and left at my Mom’s house so I don’t have to ship stuff later. I also bought my Mom a gift card to 7 Brew while I was there that I need to send back to her house because I didn’t have any kid of Christmas card to put it in. But I still need to get one or two things for her probably. My sister wanted me to go in on possibly a trip to Vegas for her and us....I”m like how many years have you known me? 40....how could I possibly afford that at a month notice?? Like I can’t that’s something that needs to be planned for. So yea I’m not doing that.
So yea I had big plans while I was sitting in Ohio to get a lot done…and basically did none of it. It is what it is. I move on and keep going. It was weird being away from my husband and son for 10 days that’s the longest stretch I’ve been by myself since probably when I was pregnant and traveled to my mom’s house without my husband. so 17 years. Like we spent the summer away from my husband for a few weeks back in 2017 but he was still active duty and working a lot then.