I am the master of my own demise
No one has to tell me, and I have no time for your lies
The only one I listen to is myself anyway
I’m good at tearing myself down
each and every god damn day
I received a black belt
for the pain that I was dealt
to myself under these robes
I don’t know what it was
I just lost control
I’m skilled at using the sword
intricate designs that you can’t afford
It’s meant to cut real deep
I felt every swipe all the way down to my feet
I learned to shoot a gun
All I need is one bullet, then I’m done
I could take the enemy out
Don’t have to look far
Don’t even have to shout
When was it that I became my own worst enemy?
I loved myself more than anyone, you see
Then something just clicked
Something deep inside
all of a sudden I ain’t give a shit
If I hurt anything
It was more like my pride
Did I need a ride or die just to keep me going?
When that ride or die was in that room with him
My him…
as I watched them and they not knowing
I’m supposed to pick myself up
I’m supposed to be enough for myself
I’m supposed to be myself
Myself?
Yeah I thought about taking myself out
Would I have been missed
I’m not even sure about that
I have yelled, I have screamed, and I have shout
I get nothing back
This is just random thoughts, you see
All the thoughts I see when I look at me
In the reflection of this ridiculous TV
I’ve taught myself how to Take Me Out
The problem is I don’t have the guts
So I sit here in my doubts
I love silence
But silence does not love me tonight
the pressure and weight
memories wanting to break free
Meditate they say
I don’t wanna meditate.
Take deep breaths, they say
My breath is so shallow, and that’s all I can take in for now
This silence is going to break me
Are you still here
(I will probably remove this. It’s here for now.)

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