Spaz in Book Two

1. I hate it when people tell me stuff I already know.
2. I know everything
3. So don’t tell me stuff

It seems to be an Asian thing, obeying the rules, being pedantic, reminding others of things they should be doing.
‘Don’t drive too fast. You’ll get a ticket’
‘Don’t touch your cell phone in the car. Use hands free! The police love to give tickets for this.’
‘Don’t feed the monkeys.’
Of course I’m not going to feed the monkeys. The monkey’s actually scare me. They are like being around a bunch of drunks. They could blow up at any moment. And shut up about the cell phone. One sentence would have been enough. You don’t need to harp on and on.

-_-

When I was a kid, we didn’t use backpacks. Everyone had blue and red Adida’s bags
Gym bags. Blue and red. Faux leather. Stupid. I don’t know why I thought of that. We called each other spaz’s. We used ‘scoff’ to mean steal. Who scoffed my pencil?