Broke down car,trying fix car,suicidal thoughts in Just Life

The head gasket blew on my car for the 2nd time. I have decided I am done. My husband took it to the mechanic and left it. I have been begging him to take it to my mom’s house and park it. He refused. I am worried the mechanic will impound it. I guess after work I will beg my brother to follow me so I can see if I can safely get it to mom’s house. I don’t know it’s fate honestly.

I have been trying to fix my mom’s truck with my brother Tom. It needs a fuel pump and body work. We are going to try to pass it for a sticker so I can drive it to and from work.

I am exhausted and depressed. This morning I thought of just downing my pills and waiting on the grim reaper instead I reminded myself I got breakfast to serve and a truck to fix. Depression is a bitch. I just keep living on. Never thought my new excuse is I got to work to care for myself and I got to keep going. Always another excuse to keep my heart beating.