the times; are they a-changin'? in 2014

gah.

i’m in a hurty headspace. i officially started planting job exploration seeds all over the place. i want to stay in my current position doing my current thing. but financially, i don’t think i have that luxury anymore. so i’ve initiated my professional network to start feeling things out. i’m starting with my favorite mentors and high -powered recruiters and we’ll see what happens.

i’ve also started to engage the full-court press on drumming up new business so i can hopefully create some momentum and create a miraculous windfall of cashflow so i don’t have to go looking elsewhere.

but alas, i think the end of my full-time self-employment chapter is nigh. i hope it’s not, but i kind of have to operate as if it is unless a few major shifts happen. a) we’re able to do our home refinance within the next few months b) i’m able to secure a regular, liveable salary starting january 1.

meh.

i’ve had a few good, solid cry sessions about this because i kind of need to mourn my current lifestyle in the case that it goes away. my current reality is SO GREAT and i’ve been SO LUCKY to have been able to do this for the past 3.5 years. and my new normal might also be interesting/amazing/challenging/lucrative… but the time i get to spend with aaron & joaquin right now is truly priceless. again, lucky that i’ve had this situation for as long as i have; but that just makes this potential transition back into the real world even more scary and unsavory.

ahhh.

so this is the plan: see what’s out there. interview for positions that sound amazing and pay more than what i’m currently pulling in. expect the worst; hope for the best.

wish me luck.