I have this nasty habit of showing up for people.
I will attend your party, answer your 3:00 AM phone call, buy you that dress you like, remember your favorite book, take you out for lunch, and listen to you rant for 5 hours just so you wouldn’t feel so alone.
I do it for practically anyone. I’m too familiar with the feeling of crying yourself to sleep and that sick feeling of disappointment when you see an empty seat at your recital.
I make that extra effort to make sure the people around me don’t get to experience that. I want to see their faces light up when someone remembers how they like their coffee. It’s an amazing feeling to know you have one person on your team.
Showing up for someone can be exhausting. Showing up for many people can be draining.
But I can’t bring myself to stop.
Even when my actions are not reciprocated.
They didn’t call on my birthday.
They didn’t show up when I needed a shoulder to lean on.
I wasn’t invited to the wedding.
And the most painful one from last week, no one came when I was brought to the ER.
My name isn’t on their list.
Even when I was the only one who showed up for them.
My love and efforts became too easy and accessible that it’s constantly taken for granted.
Maybe it’s about time to stop.
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