I'm not a TV watcher or one to catch the same show every week to know what is going on. I have skimmed across Sister Wives mostly out of curiousity because I thought that there is no way that I can relate to that family. A mission statement is a big deal to that family. When I think mission statement - I tend to think of something like a topic sentence, like homework, like something that is on the wall at the workplace, not something personal. After listening to the big deal about a mission statement and how they were going to compose and add words and the family's personal meaning into one statement, I began to think about what my mission statement would be.
My husband and I both were brought up essentially alike - church on Sundays and Wednesdays, God has always been there throughout all of our lives. Maybe God hasn't always been the focus when He needed to be, but when you grow up in church, in my opinion (some people call it guilt) it just sticks with you and you know that you are not the only person, there is something greater. I remember being a young adult and all the teachings about the "Triangle." When you and your partner both choose to pursue God and not exactly each other, the relationship prospers. I think of it as when you strive for something together that is the ultimate goal, it is more like a team effort, and you grow together in it. This part of my mission statement would be about looking past each other and focusing on the purpose.
I was talking to one of my friends, who would identify as nonreligious, about the idea of a mission statement. She really didn't understand what I meant. I tried explaining it to her as a statement, or a goal that you and your spouse work towards together. I explained that maybe the reason our marriage is suffering at this time is because we are so focused on one another and can't help but pick out flaws and how things aren't benefitting the other. She told me about goals that her and husband have - getting out of debt, small projects around the house, and having a child. Her answer wasn't what I was looking for. I know that I don't deserve to know exactly what her marriage is all about, I don't need to know their secrets and struggles. The answer wasn't what I was looking for and to be honest, I don't even know what answer I was looking for, I just know that it didn't set well with me.
I think about things in the future. I like to guess things and see how accurate my guess is. My favorite thing to do is to have my husband pick a number from 1 to 100 and then I will guess a number below 50 and above 50 and see how close I can get. Or guess how much a buggy full of groceries is going to be, or how much a vehicle costs. A question I have made him think about lately is what kind of weird pet are we going to have once we get old. Some of our relatives choices have been parakeets, cockatiels, emus, rabits, and incredibly mean Chihuahuas. Husband is not impressed by the questions and will not participate in most of my "games." And in a round about way, I feel like this relates to a mission statement. I want him to think about things that intrigue me, show interest in something I like. I feel like we have completely different ways of thinking about our future. I like to think of goofy things like what weird pets are we going to have when we get old, if we'll end up being the filthy rich people that drive a piece of shit around, if we will ever think going to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse and spending $200+ on one dinner is okay, or if we will ever be the healthy couple that runs 5k's together and drink grass juice each morning. Of course I think about more serious things about how to get out of debt faster, our farm business strategies and children. This part of my mission statement would be about future visions together, what we aim to be once we get old and things we are worried about now aren't things that will be valid later.
My dad died suddenly of a heart attack at 50. So I am not trying to kill myself now by working so hard you can't enjoy yourself. He worked his ass off for everything he ever had, and it killed him. He didn't get rewarded for all the 80 hour work weeks he spent out of town and running a company. It's sad when you have money, but no time to spend it or treat yourself. He finally bought a boat and a motorhome before he passed away, but he didn't get enough time to enjoy it like he deserved. Right now my husband and I work different shift with different off days. We both work in the city an hour away, about 100 mile round trip 5 days a week. We make decent money, awesome benefits, but how often do we see each other? Well each Sunday at noon I get to tell him that I will see him again Thursday evening. We don't really have a life together. And I don't really have a life period. I moved here when we got married and I work an hour away, so I don't know anyone in this town. I don't want our work to affect and dictate so much of our lives.
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