Lets start this party. in Trust the Journey pt 2

Hi, Sooo well my stacking habits did not go as planned this week because well this week was a shit show sooo.. lets just move on from that and onto this coming week I am a little nervous. My mom went for a mamogram last week and got a call from our family Dr. she has an appointment next week soo the Dr said they would talk about it then. soo it didn’t seem serious and it’s probably not BUT imaging also called her back she needs to go for more images and a ultrasound I think.. So she will go for that on monday and then her appointment is on Thursday I am going with her incase it’s bad news..

My family can not handle hearing that C word again we just can’t but at the same time everything that we have looked up is sounding kind of like she has calcium build up and it’s normal for people her age but the need to check it and the ultrasound is to make sure that it’s not cancer at this time.. If it’s good news then she will be going for mamograms every six months.. there is a good chance that it will turn into cancer later on so they will stay ontop of it incase that happens.. ofc we can all be wrong and looking up the wrong thing soo no real answers will come until after this mamogram and drs appointment well if it’s cancer it will be before thursday that we know but anyway..

This week ended up stressful because i am obviously thinking about this even though I say I am not apart of me is really worried. my anxiety spiked and i work with my mom so naturally she is worried and talking to me as I am her person trying to keep someone calm is always so hard. I keep telling her that I am not thinking or talking about it till we know what’s going on then I will deal with everything and that is partly true because I havent looked anything up and I havent given any opinions but I have stayed positive and let my mind over think.

Anyway today I joined WW and it’s not because it’s a program I am going to do because it’s not really but it’s a good way for me to stay committed to myself and make changes while being held accountable by myself.. I havent really done this kind of commitment in along time.. sooo here it goes your girl has goals and apart of those goals is feeling confident in myself this summer when we travel. I don’t wanna feel fat in the plane seat and i don’t wanna feel like i don’t look good in pictures because i actually take my body. I want to have cute pictures with M and I want to take them often and just because.. right now physically I am holding myself back.. I cannot continue to change without changing the physical soo lets see what kind of manifesting I can do!