"Home-made burgers are better, you know".
Oh? Why's that?
"They just are".
This isn't an answer. Tell me why whatever it is that you think is better than whatever it is that I am doing or enjoying or whatever. "It just is"/"they just are" is not an acceptable answer. I want you to fucking convince me that your way of doing things is better than mine. If you can't, sit down, have a lovely cup of fuck you with a couple of spoonfuls of shut the Hell up.
Everyone has different tastes. I may make fun of you for liking something that I don't, in a light-hearted and often terrifying way, but I won't think any less of you as a person and I sure as shit won't try to force my ideals down your throat. Have the common fucking courtesy to do the same. So you buy locally-produced organic Vegan hipster-food. Big fucking deal. I don't give a shit. Stop pretending you're better than me. Here's a newsflash: You're still going to die, whether or not you like to eat E-number-free, organic lentil fucking soup with croutons made from Jesus' holy asshair, and whatever I shovel down my throat has nothing to do with you, you pseudo-hippie organic-obsessed cocksuckers.
You're still going to die. You are not better than me. In fact, I'm honest, and far less full of shit than you, so I fucking win.
EDIT
This entire entry was a joke, you know. I was trying to wind up my girlfriend and succeeded. I probably should have mentioned that. I mean, I meant every word, but some of the comments I got from this entry indicate that some of you took it way too seriously.
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