What I Have To Do in Unafraid

Maybe that’s my problem. I’ve been so focused on what I want to do, that I’ve been neglecting the things that I have to do.

Been somber these past few days. My friend’s mother died. Heart complications, from what I understand. She had been in the hospital for awhile now, but I guess she took a turn for the worse. She was only 51. I feel horrible for my friend, Jess. She’s even younger than I am, and she’s already lost her mother. God, I don’t even want to imagine.

Jess has fallen in and out of my life since 2016. We met via a mutual friend, but maintained contact over the years. Not talking on a daily basis, mind you. We’d chat for a little bit, catch up on life and everything, and then after awhile the conversation dies down and we stop talking for a few weeks until we send each other a message out of the blue and catch up again. And I kind of like that. Who says friends need to talk to each other every single day? Anyway, we’ve known each other for several years now, so when her mom died that kind of hit me like a brick, I was in disbelief. Me and Jess were literally catching up just a few days ago and she had mentioned how her mom had been in the hospital for several days but was showing signs of improving and was even looking like she would be coming home shortly.

Jess is heartbroken, obviously. I’ve tried my best to balance giving her space to grieve and also be a supportive friend. To my credit, she seems to appreciate it. I told her to take all the time she needs. She doesn’t need to bounce back from this instantly. She’s allowed to be upset. Hell, how could anybody not be? Everybody’s life is so different; who can tell another person how to grieve or express their emotions after something like that? Nobody. And nobody can judge either.

She asked me if I’d wait for her to bounce back…

I told her to take as long as she needs. I’d be heartless not to.

She liked that answer.

Last updated December 02, 2021