rant in Depression

Okay so I kind of need to rant.

I'm really not well. I can't stop cutting myself. Everything about myself disgusts me. I'm sick of the clinic I've been going to, they are not helping and make me feel pointless and stupid. It's also like theyre reading off of a script whenever they talk to me. I need a proper doctor. One who will help me when I need them and understand me when I say I need more help, I need a higher dosage and I need something or someone to help me to want to live again. I'm so tired of this. I'm just so fucking tired.