"Friends" in Whats in a book?

So I've been meaning to write this entry all day but have been putting it off because there's some things I wanted to write about that are hard for me to think about.

Anytime I have a friendship end in a horrible way, I hate thinking about it. Even if the friendship was actually long for once.

Very long entry...beware...

I have written about my horrible luck with friendships an infinite amount of times but I thought I'd write about some specific examples to get it off my chest because I haven't told many people about them and if I did, I didn't really get into it a whole lot.

So cheryl and I have been friends since like November but lately she been really annoying me and pissing me off.

A couple weeks ago I was out at dinner at Applebees with Blake (my husband) and she kept texting me asking what I was doing. I really hate when I get more than one text asking that honestly. Its just fucking annoying to me. So I ended telling her "Cheryl, Im eating dinner. I'll talk to you later." And she took it all offensively and gave me "Sorry I even bothered you." Wooooooo wtf. Was my reaction in my head.

I admit, I used to be that way a while ago and looking back it is rude and fucking annoying to be that way. In my childhood a lot, I would talk on the phone to my "friends" and ask why they would have to go and then later on get that thrown back in my face during fights and have them say it was annoying. Which it is, looking back like I said.

I don't like to be rude to anyone honestly but I really was needy as a kid and cheryl kind of reminds me how I used to be.

And then last week we were talking on the phone at night and she fucking falls asleep on the phone yet again while im talking. And no this didn't just happen once. It's happened a handful of times. So I just texted her the next day and told her I didn't want to talk on the phone at night anymore and she's like that's fine.

And then I told her she needed more energy during the day. She took it totally the wrong fucking way of course and posted an indirect status on facebook about me. I knew what it was about because im not dumb obviously.

I don't see how it's fucking rude to say she needs more energy during the day because she does and so do I! Fuck. She falls asleep all the time and when I worked with her she was always dozing off at work. If she didn't get fired for performance im sure she would have gotten let go for the dozing off, seriously. Its truthful not rude.

I know I need more energy during the day, too so ya.

Anyway, aside from her, I had 3 bad friendships last year and i'll talk about each one.

So...bryce...

Started to really get to know him and hang with him spring of last year. At first, everything was great. We hung out at starbucks, saw scary movie 5 together and he made me laugh a lot and talked a lot on facebook about various stuff.

After we saw scary movie 5 however, everything changed. One day we were supposed to go to the gym together but he totally fucking blew me off. I got a text from him a little before we were sposed to meet up I think and he wanted to take a walk or something. Seriously? You blow me off with no call or anything and now you want to take a walk. I honestly don't remember all of the convo because it was over a year ago, but I think shortly after that argument he basically either emailed me or messaged me on fb and told me I was one of a few people, supposedly, that he couldn't talk to anymore. Didn't say why or anything. Then He said he was going to disconnect his fb for awhile even though he didn't ha.

So june of last year, after awhile of not talking, he emails me out of the blue and basically tells me he had a dream that we talked or something and he took that as a sign that he should apologize and so and so etc etc. So I basically took that as YOU HAVE A FUCKING DREAM ABOUT YOU AND I TALKING AND THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME YOU WANT TO APOLOGIZE TO ME AND WANT TO TALK TO ME AGAIN, OH PLEASE!!

So we went back and forth about this and that, I don't recall all of it but I kept saying I didn't trust him, he blew me off etc etc

And he had the audacity to come back at me with something like "Brooke, Im really trying here etc etc etc." A bunch of mumbo jumbo bs.

Long story short, at like the end of july of him giving me the run around of us hanging out and he kept giving me all this bs of being monumentally fucking busy all the time so he never could talk to me, he fucking ended up blowing me off AGAIN asking his friend if they could work out together. Even though Im the fucking one who asked him that exact same question months earlier only for him to blow me off. What the fuck ever dude. I blocked him right after that. I don't need that petty fucking bullshit in my life. Seriously.

I actually worked with his mom at my first job this year and she's really nice. From what she has told me, he's very scatter brained and spends most of his money on fast food and bullshit. Yeah, glad that "friendship" is over.

Then there's rachael....I don't even want to use these losers' real names but I don't give a shit....

So its a shorter story kind of here but anyway her and I knew each other for years through a mutual friend of ours. We hung out a few times last summer. I would always pick her up from her house and never gave me any gas money for driving like 10 miles back and forth each time.

Never even offered and was working at the time, which she always bitched about.

Long story short, she messaged me at like 7 am one time and told me in not so many words that she didn't want to talk about her and her bf having sex so much. She was acting like thats all I talked about. So we fought about it later that day and I basically told her it was bs that she messaged me on fb at like 7 am RIGHT when she got up and she didnt need to be a bitch about it.

She started to corner me in that fight on facebook and made me feel like a defenseless fucking child.

At the end of it all, she ended up deleting me off her fb for that ONE fucking fight which she started so I blocked the bitch on fb and on my phone.

I mean, I always picked her up because she was too lazy to ever try to get her license or drive a car, cuz her boyfriend had a car, and at 20 she had no ambition apparently to get a full time job or go to school for anything. Im not saying college is for everyone but she ended up getting her g.e.d. for whatever reason that was.

Thats her, in a nutshell.

And ohhhhh I saved the BEST for last....Courtney! or should I say rose....

I think its funny that when I just typed in her name...I automatically thought of this skit on the amanda show lmao!

Sooo...this is the longest story so be prepared...

I had known her for a few years before we really started talking last spring. She invited me to her dumb life group and I went a few times regrettably.

Things started going sour may of last year when she randomly sent me this long and dumb message on facebook basically telling me how I should be and telling me I shouldn't tell her all the time that Im jealous of her and telling her she was perfect because she wasn't and etc etc.

FIRST OF ALL, I never said she was perfect, I said I wish I had a lot of the things in her life because she made her life seem so fucking glamourous because all she would ever talk about on fb was...

• her perfect marriage to her husband and how great he was, and this was like all the time mind you

• talked about god and serving god, non stop, no lie

• bitched one time because she got scolded at work because her customers told her manager that she gave the worst service ever at the olive garden. Im not surprised by this in a way because I had her as a server one time and she wasn't that great honestly, but yet she boasted all the time how great of a worker she was at her jobs. She acted like it was the fucking end of the world that she got scolded because apparently miss head up her ass never had that happen at any of her jobs before.

• Oh and THIS....last summer she got chosen to go to this dumb summit but in order to go she had to have a lot of money. So she was asking everyone on fb, in a status, to give her FREE money but yet she had two jobs at the time and never saved any money for something like this? Im sorry, I know I'll get hell for this but im a firm believer in saving and I think its just rude to post a status on fb asking for money to give her when people have their own bills to worry about.

Oh and did I mention that when she sent me that long and retarded message online, my fucking friend just died and I didn't even find out soon enough to attend the funeral?!

Umm ya.

So in the end, all the feelings kept bottling up of her constant boasting about her great life and her annoying devotion to god (if you're a christian good for you but she went about it to the extreme) and her great marriage and her perfect husband. It just got to be too fucking much honestly. I don't like people that constantly brag about themselves. And when she's drunk, she's also a total bitch.

We got into a big fight through text last july, I called her a bully at some point, she which was because she made me feel cornered and stupid for not measuring up to her HER standards of what I should be.

And really, and I told her this, WHAT THE FUCK DOES SHE KNOW ABOUT ME WHERE SHE CAN TELL ME HOW TO BE AND WHAT I SHOULD DO AND SHOULDN'T DO?!

Seriously, go fuck yourself you dumb, self-centered bitch.

So I of course blocked her on fb and my phone. I never want to hear from her ass ever again.

I don't need a friend that constantly made me feel like her other friends were better than me, (like when we were at noodles and company she kept looking out the window for her other friend who was coming...), ya like that wasn't a sign I was the third fucking wheel....

So those were just a few examples of the shitty friendships I've had.

And people wonder why Im so standoffish to people. Ha, look at 26 years of bullshit people I've come across that have treated me like I was nothing, made me cry in front of the fucking class, humiliating me, blew me off for other more exciting people etc etc

the list goes on and on